Young bartender working at bar counter and pouring beer in a glass.

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

A recent report by the Western Queensland Pub And Bowls Club Alliance (WQPABCA) has found that the smart alec who yells “TAXI!” when someone drops a glass – is actually the least likely patron to engage in the services of a taxi.

Speaking to the Betoota Advocate today, WQPABCA chairman Brangus Lyceum (73, Woodford) says that his organisation commissioned this study in an effort to identify the links between being an idiot and drink driving.

“What we’ve found is that it’s always the smart mouth blokes running round the place like they’re bulletproof” says Brangus.

“The patrons least likely to order a taxi, but still the most likely to yell taxi to make fun of someone when they accidentally knock a schooner over at the bar.”

As the report details, the type of blokes to engage in drink driving, without any other consideration of another ride home – are usually the cocky blokes.

“They’re the ones who don’t mind letting a stupid idea put themselves in harm’s way. Or worse, put their mates and family in harm’s way. Put it this way, think of your mate who thinks it’s a wise move to poke fun at the quiet bull riders for wearing a loud shirt in the TAB.”

“That’s the type of dangerous behaviour we are talking about here. Stirring up bullriders is not too different to drink driving. It can cause a whole lot of hurt and pain to a lot of different people.”

“Including complete strangers.”

The report was commissioned in attempt to curb drink driving in the bush, so if you’re drinking never drive.

The report said it’s also imperative that the greater community keep an eye on these pelicans, who can usually be identified as the smart alec up the back in a brand spanking blue RB Sellars half button.

Drinking? Never Drive.

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