Sports

Outer-Suburban Boxing Gym Membership Split Between Bikie-Affiliated Fighters And Middle Aged Mums

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's entire boxing scene is completely reliant on middle aged mothers, it can be confirmed. This may come as a surprise to actual boxing fans, who thought boxing gyms were able to stay afloat with a percentage of the winnings that get brought home by the fighters they train. But that isn't necessarily the case. While the competitive side of...

LeBron And Bronny The First Father Son Combo Since 2022 Penrith Panthers And Parramatta Eels

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The sporting world is marvelling at an incredible feat that took place in the NBA today. For the first time in over two years, the world has a seen a Father/Son duo set foot on the same playing surface to play some sport. The undisputed GOAT LeBron James today added another incredible achievement to the list, by playing...

Sua’ali’i Now Has The Opportunity To Do Funniest Thing Ever In First 7 Minutes Of Wallabies Debut

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT High profile rugby league convert, Joseph-Aukuso Suaalii has been picked for the Wallabies before playing one game of professional rugby union. The former Sydney Rooster's NRL star was included in Joe Schmidt's squad of 34 players named on Tuesday, ahead of a high-pressure Spring Tour of Europe. It is believed the 21-year-old impressed coaching staff at last week's training camp...

Storm’s Accountant Dumps Hard Drive Into The Yarra Anyway

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact A Mercedes Benz G-class is sitting idle outside Hamer Hall tonight, as it stands by for a discreet drop-off. Whilst the NRL Grand Final party begins to kick off some 900kms north in Sydney, it’s alleged* some quiet operations are happening down in Victoria, as the Melbourne Storm begin to cover up any...

Eric Bana To Play Ivan Cleary In Baz Luhrmann’s New Film Based On Penrith’s Historic 4-Peat

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT In exciting news for the Australian film industry, Baz Luhrmann has reportedly just finished the screenplay of his next Australiana epic, “From The Area”. Inspired by the Penrith Panther’s incredible four-peat of premiership wins, it’s understood the Academy Award nominated director has been working on the script all season, and was last night able to give the...

Rural Newspapers Now Claiming Every NRL Grand Final Player To Ever Fill Up A Tank Of Fuel In Town

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With two teams that boast nationwide grassroots recruiting programs playing in the NRL grand final today, rural newspapers around the country are scrambling to document every vague association their town may have had with any of the players. Small town sports journalists have been flat out crafting up autobiographies for the debutants of both teams - who now 'come...

Underdog-Less NRL Final Comes Down To Whether Fans Wanna See Penrith Win A Four-Peat, Or Bottle It

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A dynasty that was forged in front of cardboard cut-outs at the height of the pandemic, the 2020s Penrith Panthers show no signs of slowing down. After a grand final loss to the Melbourne Storm in 2020, the boys from out west secured a Premiership three-peat in the years that followed. While their talent has been slowly bleeding out to...

Serious Discussions Underway About Potentially Renaming AFL To Better Represent The Modern Game

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The victorious and dominant Brisbane Lions have arrived at an inner-Brisbane pub for Mad Monday celebrations after their 2024 AFL Grand Final win on Saturday. This comes after they generously went and visited some fans at their mythical 'Melbourne home' on Sunday. But now the celebrations have returned home to Queensland. To where they belong. As one of the most 'outsider'...

Big Nelly From Welly Should Be Swelly Says Belly From Melly

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In what could only be described as a glorious last minute twist in the NRL soap opera, it can be confirmed that Melbourne Storm prop Nelson Asofa-Solomona is currently flying to Sydney to clear his name in expedited NRL judiciary. The 28-year-old from New Zealand's South Island city of Wellington, commonly known as Big Nelly From Welly, is fighting...

Queensland Wins State Of OriginFL

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Queensland has today avenged their loss to NSW in this year's State of Origin Rugby League Series. After a long couple of months in the Origin wilderness, the mighty Maroons are back. This comes after the Brisbane absolutely smokeeeeeeddddddddd the Sydney Swans in the State of OriginFL this afternoon. Lead by the likes of Ah Chee, Lohmann, Starcevich,...

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