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Trump Finally Concedes 1983 America’s Cup Loss

FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact In an unprecedented admission, Future Former President Trump has finally conceded that the 1983 America’s Cup was won by the creatively-named Australian yacht Australia II.  Australia II is a 12m racing yacht that was launched in 1982 and is not to be confused with the original Australia which is a...

Trump Demands Recount After Missing Out On RSL Meat Tray

FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact In an unexpected development, President Trump has caused a spectacle at the historic Betoota RSL over the weekend after missing out on the meat tray.  In what has been interpreted as an attempt to add credibility to his position after the disappointing election results, Trump visited the iconic...

Social Media Goes Wild Over Harry Styles Wearing A Dress Like They’ve Never Seen A Mad Monday

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Fashion publication US Vogue have made history this week by featuring British pop singer Harry Styles as its first-ever male cover star. He is also apparently the first ever white male to look like he's comfortable wearing a dress, according to woke Twitter. The cover immediately...

Mountbatten Remains Only Man Outside FNQ To Be Killed For Pulling In Someone Else’s Crab Pots

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Season 4 of Netflix’s The Crown, has opened with a bang, literally and historically - as Monarchists and Anti-Monarchists alike tune in for the newest instalment of the historical drama series. This season follows the royal family from 1977 to 1990, and introduces the world to a teenage Diana...

Trump Fires Fauci And Appoints Pete Evans To Lead Covid Taskforce In Final Days Of Presidency

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The President of The United States of America has today taken some time off from golf to tie up a few loose ends. Speaking from the Whitehouse, where he is very much not a lame-duck President, Trump has followed through on a pre-election promise and fired Dr. Anthony...

Trump’s Team Return From Philadelphia And Regroup Back At White House Painting Supplies

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT President Trump’s desperate bid to hang on to the White House has verged into "now that's just sad" territory over the weekend, after his campaign hosted a major press conference at a Philadelphia landscaping business situated between a crematorium and and adult entertainment shop. Trump was playing golf on...

Trump Declares Himself Victorious In Round Of Golf After Taking Lead On 4th Hole

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The still current President of the United States has today had a much-needed win. After making par on a couple of holes, Donald Trump managed to stay ahead of some businessman he was playing and subsequently called time on the round. This comes 24...

Trump Promises To Hit Em With The Gutho If He Can Somehow Manage To Turn This Thing Around

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT US President Donald Trump has today made a bold promise to re-energise his base. With things looking as grim as they possibly could without yet being over, The President of The United States has promised his fans to 'hit em with the Gutho' if he can somehow try...

Trump Demands They Stop Counting Votes In States Where He’s Winning But Keep Going In Arizona

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The current President of the United States has today issued some updated demands on the 'rigged electoral system.' Speaking from Washington DC, Donald Trump has demanded that all counting stop in some places, but also continue in some other places. With Trump's lead vanishing...

President Who Was Initially Elected With Less Votes Than Opponent Claims The System Is Rigged

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The current President of the United States has today called the system that elected him rigged. Speaking earlier, the former host of Celebrity Apprentice has accused electoral officials of blatant fraud and trying to 'steal' the election off him. Donald Trump's team say they...

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