World News

Rupert Murdoch Says Kevin Rudd Is Being ‘Ungrateful’ Considering He Made Him PM

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Former Prime Minister Kevin Rudd has been slammed by the man who gave him the top job today after he criticised him for meddling in federal politics. Newspaper mogul Rupert Murdoch, a minor stakeholder in The Advocate's parent company, lashed out at the once-popular politician in response to the criticisms, saying Rudd is 'ungrateful'. "How fucking dare he," said Murdoch...

Malcolm Has Tantrum As Lucy Suggests They Go To Australian-Themed NYC Bar To Watch Roosters

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact "It starts WHEN?" asked Malcolm loudly in his barrister's voice. "Half past five in the morning? Are you mad? And of all the places, why on Earth would you think I'd want to go there?" As this news organ is simply a front to promote Turnbullist policy and ideas, The Advocate enjoys a weekly phone call with the former prime minister Malcolm Turnbull...

Report: Shania Had Almost Unachievably High Standards In Hindsight

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A recent report by the School Of Social Sciences at the University Of Queensland has found that prominent late 1990s country pop singer, Shania Twain, had almost unattainably high standards for prospective lovers. This reports comes as the world prepares to celebrate the 20th anniversary of the iconic Canadian singer's single "That Don't Impress Me Much" from her...

Mark Knight: “I Actually Have Lots Of African-American Friends”

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The cartoonist at the centre of worldwide condemnation has defended his work this morning by revealing he actually has lots of African-American friends - meaning it's impossible for him to be racist. Mark Knight's depiction of 23-time tennis Grand Slam champion Serena Williams in a Herald Sun cartoon earlier this week has been branded racist,...

“Burning Man Used To Be Way Better” Says Darwin Woman Who Went To Burning Man Two Years Ago

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A Darwin-based social worker who's entire personality is based around the fact that she took heaps of acid in the Nevada desert in 2016, says no one else will ever be able to experience what she did. Burning Man is an annual, nine-day gathering in the desert that includes artistic performances, installations, and music. The nine-day...

Report: Ricky Gervais Least Healthy Looking Vegetarian

Louis Burke | Culture | Contact Comedian and owner of the world’s most boisterous laugh, Ricky Gervais has recently been identified as the least healthy looking vegetarian anyone has ever seen in a sixteen-year independent study. Following his first comedy special in eight years, the highly revered writer and comedian shared with the audience how his love for animals means he...

Man Who Went To See Trevor Noah For The Edgy Jokes Disappointed To Learn He’s A Bit Of A Pussy

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Bradley Bambach likes to think that he tiptoes along the line with his humour. The 28-year-old account manager at a boutique, bespoke agency in Betoota's Old City District has been partial to a joke that hasn't flown in the past. So, that's why he likes to get down to see some live comedy that really pushes the boundaries of what...

British Game Show With Celebrities Ultimately Unconcerned About Actually Playing

Louis Burke | Culture | Contact A British game show featuring a panel of celebrities has confused viewers once again, as the host and contestants seem ultimately unconcerned about answering questions, scoring points and just playing the alleged game in general. The quiz show titled The Cheeky Buggers Club is most known for being the show that is usually on the...

Australian Living In London Looks Forward To Having Couch Back When Summer Ends

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Aussie ex-pat, Annabel Livingstone, has been living in London for the best part of three years, meaning she has seen her fair share of European Summers. And while this may sound like paradise for any Australian slumming it through Australia’s driest winter on record, for Annabel it is an absolute punish. Not because the...

Trump Admits He Should’ve At Least Offered Stormy Daniels An Internship Before Their Affair

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Former personal attorney for President Donald Trump, Michael Cohen is at the centre of a number of scandals involving payments to silence two women who allege they had sexual encounters with Trump before he was president. While it is absolutely disgraceful for a President to have ever had a sexual relationship outside of wedlock, it is also disgusting to...

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