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President Who Was Initially Elected With Less Votes Than Opponent Claims The System Is Rigged

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The current President of the United States has today called the system that elected him rigged. Speaking earlier, the former host of Celebrity Apprentice has accused electoral officials of blatant fraud and trying to 'steal' the election off him. Donald Trump's team say they...

Trump Appears To Take Close Election Result Quite Well

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The current President of the United States appears to be taking the election numbers quite well, it can be confirmed this afternoon. While Joe Biden has told supporters in a sort speech that 'we are going to win this,' Trump is yet to publicly appear.

John McCain Fucks Donald Trump From The Grave In Arizona

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT President Trump and Joe Biden notched their first major victories of election night as news publications project that Trump will win Florida and Ohio, two battleground states that bucked the trend by voting for Obama twice before flipping back to the Republicans But the results in most other...

Bad News For Trump In Detroit After Man Famous For Rapping About Killing Women Endorses Biden

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Trump campaign are ready to cut their losses in Michigan at any many, after a major celebrity endorsement has begun to show it's face at the ballot. Eminem, also known as Slim Shady, also known as the guy that sang that horrific song called 'Kim' where he raps...

Report: Florida Swinging Like A Dick In Trackies

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As the results from the US election begin to flow in from the Eastern states of America, the State of Florida is flip-flopping around like an early morning or post-shower pre-bed dick in trackies. The crucial state of Florida is swinging back and forth, from blue to red...

Entitled Out-Of-Touch Leftie Elite Attempts To Force His Climate Change Agenda Onto Australia

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Noted Greenie Boris Johnson has today tried to push his climate change agenda on Australia. This comes after the UK Prime Minister called our Prime Minister to urge him to take 'bold action' on the issue overnight. The Old Eatonian, a noted sandstone school...

iPhone 12 Turns Out To Be The Shiniest And Expensivest Rectangle Yet

FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact Apple, manufacturers of shiny expensive rectangles, are about to release the iPhone 12 on Friday, and as predicted by industry insiders, the new model is the shiniest and expensivest rectangle to date.   The phone, which in a design breakthrough features a rectangular body with rounded corners, also continues...

New Zealand Start Making Their Community Hall COVID Safe Ahead Of Weekend’s Election

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Our neighbours across the ditch have started getting ready for their big election day coming up. Taking place over the weekend, the Kiwis are set to head to the community hall to vote in either Jacinda or Judith, with the current PM holding a 27 point lead as...

Ronaldo’s Habit Of Diving On Floor After Slightest Contact Preventing Nurses From Treating Him

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Portuguese footballing superstar Cristiano Ronaldo is causing a bit of a scene, it can be confirmed today. The Juventus forward is doing so in some under the pump European hospital where he is being treated for COVID-19. The already overworked staff have revealed that...

Whales Urged To Download GPS Map Updates

FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact Cetacean experts have called on all migrating whales to download the latest GPS map updates following the recent mass stranding in Tasmania, an island off the coast of Australia.   Late last month almost 400 pilot whales died when they beached themselves at Macquarie Point. The...

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