World News

Overseas Friends Not Aware They’re Living In COVID-19 Ravaged Countries According To Instagram

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Coronavirus is continuing its spread across the world, with more than 20 million confirmed cases in 188 countries. More than 700,000 people have lost their lives. Cases of the disease are continuing to surge in many countries, while others which had apparent success in suppressing initial outbreaks are now...

“Oh Did You Guys Only Just Figure Out A Vaccine Today?” Kim Jong-Un Tells Putin

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Just hours after his big announcement, Vladimir Putin has today had the smile wiped off his face, it can be confirmed. The Betoota Advocate can exclusively reveal this afternoon that Putin has had the air taken out of him by North Korean Supreme Leader and Marshal Of The...

Lefties Confused As Two People With Slightly Different Political Views Agree To Work Together

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The global left-wing movement is currently sitting upright in disbelief this morning, following the news that Joe Biden has picked Kamala Harris to be his running mate in the 2020 US election. The pair will take on US President Donald Trump and Vice-President Mike Pence at the ballot box on November...

Report: New Zealand Just Showing Off Now

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As Australia comes to terms with another bad day of numbers from the two most populous states, a new report has revealed that things are still pretty sweet over the Tasman. It's been confirmed in a new report this week that New Zealand is now just showing off.

Passive Aggressive TV Celebrity With More Money Than God Surprisingly A Bit Hard To Work With

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In the most recent headlines to take attention away from the COVID-19 pandemic, the Black Lives Matters movement, and the calls to stop powerful men in the arts and law from sexually assaulting their female colleagues, there have been revelations that popular daytime TV host Ellen DeGeneres is an absolute piece of...

The Dixie Chicks To Also Remove Sexist ‘Chicks’ Component Of Band Name, Now Known As “The”

FRANKIE DeGROOT | News | CONTACT The group formerly known as ‘The Dixie Chicks’, who dropped the apparently racist ‘Dixie’ part of their name last month, have again changed their name by also removing the sexist ‘Chicks’ component. The group will now be known as "The" Formed in Texas in 1989, the all-female country group originally...

Trump Hires Real Estate Photographer To Make Rallies Look Bigger Than They Really Are

FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact After his embarrassing Tulsa rally, President Donald Trump has resorted to drastic measures to avoid another gaffe. The rally, held on June 20 in the BOK Centre in Tulsa, Oklahoma, was predicted to have over 1 million attendees, after that many tickets were reserved. However, the actual attendance...

Multiple Women Accuse Justin Timberlake Of Historical Crimes Against Denim

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Multiple women have come forward on social media alleging that singer-songwriter-actor Justin Timberlake engaged in historical crimes against denim. The allegations suggest that the former lead singer of NSYNC completely overdid it with the sturdy cotton warp-faced textile, starting in late 2001, just prior to his break-up with Britney.

Countries With Anti-Expert Approach To Covid-19 Surprisingly Still Not Great Right Now

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some truly shocking news, a few of the countries who have taken a noticeably anti-expert approach the Coronavirus outbreak, are in a fair bit of curry. The news follows confirmation from the likes of Brazil and the United States that they are experiencing devastating outbreaks of the...

Boycott Heats Up As China Now Threatens To Stop Buying Australia

FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact The relationship between China and Australia is at an all time low today as Beijing has threatened in a tersely-worded statement that if relations do not improve, China will immediately cease purchasing Australian companies, houses, resources and vast swathes of prime Australian agricultural land. Chinese entities currently own (or have 99 year leases on) the...

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