Man Who Didn't Eat Halloumi Within 2 Minutes Now Forced To Chew Through Squeaky Piece Of Rubber
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT A 29 year old man who failed to eat his halloumi within the first two minutes
Man Who Didn't Eat Halloumi Within 2 Minutes Now Forced To Chew Through Squeaky Piece Of Rubber
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements
Latest
Mouth-Breathing Bloke Describes Predominately Gay Suburb As “A Bit Out There”
VICKI DERWENT | Lifestyle | CONTACT A man with a limited vocabulary and a deep fear of saying a slur has recently
New Dad’s Sneeze Just Became 10 Times Louder
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Militantly Well Trained Border Collie At Park Tempts Young Couple To Make The Worst Decision Of Their Lives
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT A young Sydney couple are reportedly considering making the worst decision of their lives after watching
Local Nan Offers Rogue Mandarin From Handbag
VICKI DERWENT | Lifestyle | CONTACT A local Betoota grandmother has been caught offering a mandarin straight out of her handbag to
Trump Clarifies He Was Actually A Firefighter During 9/11
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact US President Donald Trump has used the Republican midterms convention to clarify statements he
Weirdo Guy From Work With The Foldable Samsung In Crisis Today
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local pointdexter who works in Betoota's Old City District has today watched his
OPINION: Unprecedented Numbers Of Depressed Virgins Who Don't Partake In Society Should Be Viewed As A Triumph For Free Speech
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PM Joins Home & Away As Alf Stewart's Confirmed Bachelor Brother From Paddington As Government Takes Back Control Of What We All Watch
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Local News
Sweet Summer Child: Mate From Sydney Insists On Leaving An Hour Early To Find A Park
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT A Sydney man is currently experiencing his seventeenth wave of culture shock after landing in Queensland
Local Woman Trying To Enjoy Discreet Takeaway Dinner Subjected To Needlessly Identifiable Bag Of Shame
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT A woman in Betoota’s french quarter feels privacy is no longer a right but instead
Suburban Mega Pub Has Definitely Never Served A Beer To Anyone As Hot As The AI Chick In The Flyer
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With a playground for the sugar-high kids and 800 exciting poker machines, The Elephant'
Kid With A Teacher Mum Knocks Book Week Out Of The Park Again
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT Remy Matthews' arrival to school this morning has left all the other kids in Ms
The Nation
Report Finds That 90% Of Husbands Think Louis Vuitton And Louboutin Are The Same Brand
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Report Finds That 90% Of Husbands Think Louis Vuitton And Louboutin Are The Same Brand That
Range Rover Owner Not Happy That Every Other 4WD Looks Exactly The Same As His Baby Nowadays
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Every second 4WD vehicle now looks like a Range Rover, that's according to a
Corporate Tower Lift Now Permanently Stinks Like The Fruity Stench Of Modern Finance Bros
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Anyone Wearing These Pervert Glasses Needs A Hiding, Says Mainstream Australian Society
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World News
Yep Nothing To Worry About Here
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Drunk Man Receives Unabridged History Of Pakistan After Asking Uber Driver His Thoughts On Imran Khan
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Farewell Dolly - An Icon For Rural Communities, Feminists, Rednecks, Gays, The Poor And The Glitzy
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Dolly Parton, the American country music singer who rose from rural poverty in post-war Tennessee
Never Ending Euro Heatwave Forces Spaniards To Push Back Dinner Even Later
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Politics
Melbourne Media Will Have To Dig A Little Deeper If They Think A DUI and Some Goey Is Enough To Stop This Thing
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Liberals To Defend Big Tech's Right To Stream This Shit Into The Frontal Lobes Of Vulnerable Young Men
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Federal Opposition will defend the status quo and protect the God-given rights of young
One Nation Vows To Let Australians Spend Their Super On A Brand New Isuzu DMAX
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT One Nation's greatest minds are currently discussing a new policy to allow Australians to
Opposition To Oppose Algorithm Reforms Because Their Entire Political Strategy Relies On Brain Rot
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Federal Opposition has this week vowed that they will oppose new legislation aimed at stopping
Sports
Carn The Replacements! Reigning Premiers Crushed By ‘The Sydney Swaps’
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A sporting fairytale is emerging in the AFL this September. After weeks of daunting conversations about
So-Called Rabbitohs Fan Hasn't Even Gotten On The Piss Down The Newmarket
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Sydney Swans Cautiously Decide Against Launching Into An Out-Of-Control Bender At An Extremely Indiscreet Venue In The Centre Of A Major City To Celebrate Round 24 Victory Over Mighty North Melbourne
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Sporting World Shocked To It's Core As New Breaks That This Silly Bugger Might've Had A Bump In Majorca
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The entire planet's sports media ecosystem is at a standstill today. The unthinkable has