EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

Health and Safety officers have been left gobsmacked this week, as an employee at the Betoota Heights Westfield Shopping Centre Cheesecake Shop discovered that a coffee mud cake sitting in the front window is harbouring some disgusting secrets.

It’s alleged that the cheesecake had gone unpicked for almost two decades without notice, and that it had even started to resemble a lamington due to the thick coating of dust that had settled on the icing.

The staff member in question, a newly appointed 18 year old employee named Elsie Chandler, says she began to grow suspicious after noticing how rusty the door to the cake window was, and the fact that she hadn’t seen any of the old cakes being thrown out.

“I’d been working here full time for about two weeks and we sold maybe five cakes?”, Elsie explains, “we’d replaced the ones sold, but the other 14 cakes have still been sitting there.”

“And I know that for sure because there’s a chocolate one that has a fly that got stuck in the cherry maraschino sugar.”

Suspicious, but too scared to notify the managers (which she suspected were well aware they were shilling cakes old enough to vote), Elsie tells our reporter that she secretly sent a small slice of the cake to a nearby lab – and was absolutely shocked by their findings.

“The cake is roughly twenty years old”, says Elsie, “apparently they could tell by the number of rings in the layers.”

“It was so stale it took an industrial drill saw to cut through it.”

More to come.

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