World News

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The entire plant is still kind of surprised that Elon Musk has not somehow made this missing submersible story about himself. The 6.7-metre submersible Titan, operated by US-based OceanGate Expeditions, began its descent at 8am on Sunday (local time) - and has become a global news story since everyone became an expert on underwater travel. Many thought this disaster would...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In a recent case of ‘sounds about right’, it has been revealed that the nation’s conservative population has no problem changing pronouns when paying fealty to our royal British overlords. In what was unfortunately the biggest change to an Australian public holiday in recent history, the Queen's Birthday public holiday will now be referred to as the King’s Birthday...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The New Zealand has officially entered a recession today after the lastest growth data has shown the economy has receded for the second quarter on record. While it was predicted by a number of economists, it's cold comfort to the seven ordinary Kiwis that are now looking for a new job as the news has...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A young couple have today shocked their wider friendship and acquaintance circle, by unleashing a glorious photo dump from Tuscany and the Amalfi Coast. Filled with gorgeous stone farmhouses and aperol spritz's in stunning coastal locations, the photo dump has come as a surprise to some, who thought the couple were actually doing it tough after buying their...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In a developing story from the Democratic People's Republic of Western Australia, the state's parliament has fallen. Residents of the state and its neighbouring country of Australia are watching on in shock today, as the DPRWA's military storm the capital. The military has reportedly stormed the state's parliament, seizing on the power vacuum that was created by the...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation of Australia has this week been given an eye-opening piece of information. We have learnt that not talking shit about your biggest trade partner is actually quite good for business - particularly if your economy relies heavily upon exporting things like resources, and importing things like students and tourists. The revelation comes as China revealed it...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT JUST COMING OFF THE M1: Prime Minister Albanese has been reportedly dogged quite severely overnight, after inviting one of the older boys to his carefully curated house party. In reports out of Washington DC, it seems that President Joe Biden has cancelled a visit to Australia, the second leg of his upcoming Asia trip. Biden's visit was expected to...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Australian footballing community is buzzing today, after news broke about a huge international signing. Melbourne City has confirmed that one of their players has broken the A-League Mens transfer record after being bought by a Belgian Club. Young sensation Jordan Bos has confirmed a move to Belgian Pro League after he was bought by European powerhouses KVC...

RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact The sprawling government apparatus that administers the day to day livelihoods of all 38 million Canadians has just recorded its most efficient and effective week of operations since the Country was first established in 1867. The smooth governance comes after 155,000 public servants went on strike to demand the usual shit like more money, better pay, higher fiscal return...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some breaking news from the Thai city of Chiang Mai today, it has been confirmed that a local tourist attraction has more life in it than an entire NRL club. A local veterinary expert has confirmed to The Advocate that a tiger drugged within an inch of its life has more bite in it that 17 professional...