Sports

Team That’s Lost 9 Out Of Last 10 Tests In Australia Apparently Too Important For Quarantine

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some news that will not shock cricket fans, the English Cricket Board and their team are carrying on again. Facing the daunting prospect of getting whitewashed in the blistering Australian sun, the powers of English cricket are pretending like they are up in arms about the conditions they'll be subjected to. Currently, Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison...

Fans Of Team That Scored A Single Try In 80 Minutes, Still Blowing Up About Trainer Stoppage

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Blue and Gold Army have not calmed down, it can be confirmed today. With a few days of water under the bridge since their Elimination Final loss to old foes the Penrith Panthers, it's been revealed that the whinging has not eased one little bit. This comes as Parramatta Eels fans continue to complain about the Panthers'...

Jayden Campbell Begins 2022 Off-Season With 15 Kilogram Pasta Dish And 3.7 Litre Protein Shake

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After playing a big role in the Gold Coast Titan's first finals appearance in five years, NRL rookie Jayden Campbell is already back in the gym to prepare for what many believe will be a sensational 2022 season. Many believed the 21-year-old was too light to even get a start in 2021, but his elusive ball skills and...

Roosters Fan Relieved To Be Able To Finally Live His Truth And Proudly Support The Wallabies

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A Sydney man has this week had a huge weight lifted off his shoulders. The Paddington local explained that with the Roosters now out of the NRL finals, he can quietly go back to enjoying his beloved Wallabies. This comes after the Roosters lost convincingly to the Manly Sea-Eagles on Friday night, before the Wallabies pulled off a...

37-Year-Old NRL Player Tossing Up Between Retirement Or 3-Year Contract With The Tigers

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A late-30s professional rugby league player has now reached that point in his career where he has to choose between an immediate retirement, or playing low quality football until he is 40. Kenneth Cronklie (37) currently has several offers to work as either a pokie rep for Aristocrat, a real estate agent for Ray White, or if things get...

Report: How’s Those Citizenship Papers Coming Along Scotty?

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT After a famous Sunday night win for one of our sporting teams, the nation has today asked the government to chase up a bit of admin. With the state governments trying to take care of the mess the boys from Canberra have created, the Feds have been asked to at least sort out some paperwork for a man...

Report: Presto’s Boy Got Some Chop

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In a mid-to-late season entry that could bring a tear to even the most calloused, dried, Gold Coast eye, the results are in and Presto’s boy has got some chop in him. Son of rugby league legend Preston Campbell, Jayden Campbell will play fullback for the Gold Coast Titans in their first NRL finals game in five years in...

Springboks To Get Fucken Stepped On Sunday

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT For the first time since 2017, the Wallabies have named Quade Cooper as flyhalf for their Sunday night showdown against South Africa at CBUS Super Stadium. Many analysts thought the 33-year-old was initially brought into the squad as a 'mentor' - and at most an injury cover - but things have changed over the last couple months. With travel...

Newcastle Bloke Who Plays Screaming Jets And Rewatches ’97 GF Every Single Night Hardly Noticing Lockdown

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT NOW YOU SEE THE REASON WHY NOT EVERYONE'S THE SAME: The statewide NSW lockdown looks set to be eased this weekend for a number of regional LGAs, including the Mid North Coast, west to Tamworth and north to the Queensland border. NSW Deputy Premier John Barilaro says he is pushing for parts of the North Coast, Riverina and...

Twin Waters Hotel Staff Politely Ask If They Could Have A Couple Hours Without Drill Rap

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The good people working at the Twin Waters resort the NRL players are staying at have finally drawn a line in the sand today. After a couple of months of housing a group of NRL clubs forced to relocate out of NSW, the resort's manager has decided enough is enough. "The music. I need a break. The staff...

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