Headlines

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After nearly a month in Iso, local bloke Tom Theiss is facing the soul-crushing predicament of having no one to validate him for, what he believes to be, a cracking sense of humour. "It's just not the same trying to talk shit about council workers with the wife after a bottle cab sav on the couch" "You don't get the...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As Australia battens down the hatches for what looks like an imminent economic depression caused by the COVID-19 pandemic, society must now also wrestling with the bizarre lack of human contact that comes with social-distancing and isolation. Bars and restaurants have scrapped in-house dining. Movie theatres are closed. Airlines are seeking government bail-outs. All professional sport is postponed and...

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT Though everyone is quick to blame those pesky millennials for everything, it’s alleged that the anxiety-riddled younger generation are taking the COVID-19 pandemic a lot more seriously than their parents, who from many reports appear to be flouting the rules and continuing their day to day activities since the Bondi-crowd-shaming of last month.It appears that no amount of...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the quarantine of rugby league reaches the one-month mark, administrators are working around the clock to secure a kick off to the re-start of the 2020 NRL season. Outside of getting the football back underway, the NRL is dedicating all other resources to ensuring their players don't spend too much time on the internet. With fears of even more...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Roads across the country have experienced the quietest Easter since the First World War, with police promising a crackdown on non-essential travel and holidays. All last month Australians had been told to cancel trips and stay at home to prevent the spread of COVID-19. Even family gatherings, and gatherings of more than two people have been banned and state governments...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In a very weird and clear example of hypocrisy, the Nine Network has this week launched a brutal attack on the NRL, accusing the league of mismanagement and breaking its lucrative broadcast deal. Once the most powerful media player in Australia, the Nine Network is nowadays most commonly known for eroding Australian societal standards with the brain fodder acronyms...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As of 6:00am this morning, there have been 6,152 confirmed cases of COVID-19 in Australia. There have been 100 new cases since 6:00am yesterday. Of the 6,152 confirmed cases in Australia, 52 have died from COVID-19. With the curve beginning to show signs of flattening in Australia, medical experts and politicians say social distancing will more important than ever...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT At 7pm on Friday the 9th of April, households across the Australia are urged to stand on their doorsteps and balconies and applaud the efforts of the NRL administrators and the brave players for their hard work in re-starting the 2020 rugby league season. This comes as the Australian Rugby League Commission announces it plans to get rugby league...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With the largest city in Australia now running at about 30% capacity due to COVID-19 social distancing measures, a large number of usually easily-ignorable dysfunctions of day to day life in Australia have been highlighted. In an even weirder twist, some of these stark inequalities have even been resolved. The first nagging issue to be addressed with the napalm...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Ambulance staff have been called to Brisbane's inner-south today, after a stockbroker from J.P Meninga stumbled down the bottom four flights of the Kangaroo Point Cliff stairs. The prominent Queen Street cowboy was allegedly spotted trying to go for a jog without his $90-per-hour personal trainer there to guide him on his stride. Angus Winton-Knightingale (33) is reportedly in a...