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QLD Premier Says Damage Caused By NRL Magic Round Will Help Speed Up Olympics Developments

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The resilient people of Brisbane have been left to pick up the pieces today, after welcoming more than 140,000 rugby league to their city Friday through to Sunday. In its fifth year, the NRL Magic Round sold out in record time, and played host to every single bucks party in Australia over the weekend. With eight NRL matches taking place...

Report: Just Nationalise Sportsbet You Pussy

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the sunshine disappears behind the icy rain of an unseasonably bitter winter, the current cost-of-living crisis could not be more front of mind for all Australians. Without the cost-free distraction of the beaches and parklands that make up Australia's great outdoors, the price-gouged costs of bread and meat is far more dispiriting when you don't have a...

Federal Budget Aims To Diversify Local Manufacturing Beyond Outer-Suburban Rental Properties

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australian Treasurer Jim Chalmers is an inch away from a full-blown dummy spit this week, after his third Federal Budget was openly ridiculed by both the public, the media, and a Federal Opposition As a doctor of political science and a rising star of the Labor Party, Chalmers had hoped this budget would be compared to the famous economic...

As Well As Not Paying Tax Or Royalties, Mining Companies No Longer Have To Pay Humans To Drive Trains

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In news that only accidentally made it in to the papers, it seems the all-powerful multinational mining corporations have begun a rapid automation of the high-paid Aussie jobs once used to justify their blatant tax-dodging operations. As Australia's hospitals and education systems buckle under the stress of yet-to-be-declared economic recession, the resources sector that holds both sides of our...

Coworkers Now Blatantly Coming To Work With Exact Same Symptoms We Lived In Fear Of For 3 Years

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With this year's flu season kicking off earlier than usual, it seems that the nation has simply made peace with the fact that sometimes we are going to have to be exposed to people who have a runny nose or chesty cough. As a cost-of-living crisis collides with a general defiance of public health orders, it seems people are...

Caloundra Boomers Enraged To Learn About Plans For Sunshine Coast To Have Decent Public Transport Options

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An army of the Sunshine Coast's erratic post-war Australians have today declared war against the Labor Government that they brought into power with extreme pandemic swing-voting. The Caloundra boomers, who are tree-changing blow-ins themselves, are absolutely livid to learn about the introduction of decent public transport services that will bring waves of out-of-towners to their beachside town. They say that...

Beef Week First-Timer Cops Life Ban From The Criterion After Ordering Surf And Turf, Hold The Turf

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An agribusiness nerd who has spent the week annoying Queensland cattlemen in Rockhampton with his creepy intensive farming technology has finally been told where to go. Calvin Caspian (44) is clearly a Beef Week first-timer, judging by his arrogant attitude towards the very reason that 115,000 people are gathered in Central Queensland. After 3 full days of talking absolute shit...

Solar Panel Installer Can Fucken Yarn

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Anyone out there who is in desperate need of a week's worth of small talk should consider getting solar panels put on their roof, as this paritcular technology is renowned for having some of the most talkative contractors in all of suburban Australia. Lonely old retirees and bored stay-at-home mums have proven to be the most eager to take...

Mate Asks If You’ve Seen This New TV Show Everyone Is Talking About On One Of The 8 Major Streaming Services That Have All But Replaced Free-To-Air Broadcasts But...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Some idle suburban chit chat has fallen flat today, as two mates attempt to talk about the new thing. What they've found - as two blokes who've known each other since back when the entire nation would religiously tune in to watch the latest Chris Lilley comedy program every Thursday night at 730pm - is that there is no...

“Ya Know George Miller Was Born George Miliotis?” Says Every Single Uncle At Greek Easter This Year

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT For the nearly half a million Greek Australians who identify as Orthodox Christians, the release of George Miller's new action-packed road thriller couldn't have been better timed. In 2024, yesterday marked the delicious Orthodox Easter celebrations, a date which often falls more than a month after the more-widely recognised western Easter Sunday which comes with a public holiday. However, regardless...

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