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Detained Biloela Girls Begin Kicking Torpies In A Hope To Get Gillon McLachlan’s Attention

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Ahead of today's decision regarding the fate of Tamil asylum seekers Nadesalingam and Priya, and their two children - a special order of Sherrin footballs have been sent to the Christmas Island detention centre by supporters of the family. In an effort to get the attention of AFL CEO...

Albo Briefs Party On Why Taking $100k Cash Donations From Dodgy Chinese Men Isn’t A Good Look

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Following yet another wave of chaotic ICAC findings into terminally corrupt NSW Labor Party, Federal leader Anthony Albanese MP has had to take things into his own hands. ALP insiders say it's been a long time coming, and that Canberra very rarely intervenes on corruption at a state level...

Liberal Party Donors Rush To Call Dibs On New Boatful Of Au Pairs Intercepted By Border Force

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Home Affairs office is today being hammered by emails from the 16-variations of the last name 'McLachlan' that exist in South Australia, following the news that a boatful of European women have been caught trying to enter Australia illegally. The sexy bunch of women have been identified as...

“You Need To Understand I’m Actually Not That Good At My Job” Says Now Panicking Peter Dutton

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A new twist in the curious case of the well-liked Tamil family from rural Queensland has shown that Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton actually isn't that good at stopping the boats, a revelation that contradicts pretty much his entire pre-election campaign. After being hammered by thousands of critics regarding...

Local Tight-Arse Survives Entire Winter Without Having To Shell Out For One Of These Bad Boys

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local bachelor, Ryan Thawley (26) says don't underestimate how gotdam warm your bed can get by simply throwing a sleeping bag on top of your doonah. "Seriously though" he says, with a big grin. With the mercury going well blow zero in Betoota for most mornings...

Soaking Intern Cops A “Bit Wet Out There?” From Middle Management Alpha

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As of today, Cynthia Marley (20) has only been in her role as an unpaid intern at the head office for RockRoll Stage Hire And Audio for two weeks. But she's already figured out who doesn't want her there. Like any other communications graduates from the...

Dutton’s Colleagues Continue With Trend Of Tormenting Brown Kids Like That Night In Pinkenba

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton has somehow found himself back in the same position he was in 25-years-ago, surrounded by public servants who enjoy terrifying young brown kids and their families as part of their job. This comes as the Western Queensland town of Biloela's beloved Tamil family of...

Amy Shark’s Top Knot Now Verging On Safety Hazard

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Gold Coast indie pop superstar, Amy Shark has today revealed she spends most of her day-to-day life wearing a neck brace - so to combat the physical strain her body endures from supporting her ever-growing high knot bun. It's just one of the many new hurdles that the internationally-renowned...

Quality Of Produce At Fruit Markets Judged Solely On Size Of Old Mate’s Greek Orthodox Cross

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Fruit and vegetables are best judged by the size of the gold cross buried in the chest hair of the bloke spruiking them to you. A gold cross necklace is any necklace featuring a Christian cross or crucifix worn by a variation of different Christians. They are often received...

New Documentary Warns Black Men About The Risks Of Doing Anything Other Than Playing Sport

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An amazing new film that was released in cinemas around the country over the weekend has been described by the Herald Sun as a 'breathtaking insight into the perils of not knowing your place in Victoria'. Ahead of its North American premiere, The Australian Dream discusses everything that happened...

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