ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The world’s largest investment fund manager, Blackrock, is divesting in fossil fuels.

Not because they’re concerned about the climate, they say, but because they can make more money for their clients by investing in the renewable energy sector.

That’s boiled the Prime Minister’s piss because he’s rejected that reasoning from Blackrock, telling reporters today in Canberra that they’re only bowing to ‘PC culture’ and ‘screeching inner-city lefties’.

“I don’t for one second believe that Blackrock is in it for the money,” said Scott Morrison.

He is the Prime Minister.

“We have categorically proven time and time again that there’s more money and jobs to be made in coal and other fossil fuels. People in regional Australia depend upon these industries for their livelihoods,”

“And I won’t take that away from them because the rich people down in the big cities say that a little bit of carbon set half the bloody country on fire. No, Blackrock is divesting in fossil fuels to appease these fat cats,”

“These private school bed-wetters who’ve never had to get their hands dirty. Ones who’ve spent their entire professional careers in either the public service or in an industry as woefully inefficient as the public sector like advertising or marketing. Blackrock doesn’t care about regional Australia. They don’t care about their profits or their customers, they care about appearing to be progressive and cool,”

“What are people in the bush going to do if they’re not working in coal mines? Come back to me when you’ve got a real answer.”

Treasurer Josh’s eyes rolled back in his head.

In a deep, guttural voice, he said the word ‘surplus’ six times then snapped back to reality like nothing happened.

“Exactly, Josh. They just don’t understand money. These Blackrock people will send you to the poor house.”

More to come.


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