EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

As news spread that opposition leader Anthony Albanese had tested positive for covid shortly after visiting the Byron Bay Bluesfest, his supporters have been assured that he’ll still continue to campaign from home with the help of his trusted technology.

Posting that he was ‘feeling fine’, Albanese will have to stay in isolation for several days as part of the national health guidelines, which means that he’ll have to temporarily put his public appearances on hold until he’s in the clear.

And though this may seem like terrible timing, it could actually work in his favour as it gives Morrison a whole week to put his foot in his mouth again. 

In fact, it may be better if Albanese just keeps quiet until the actual election and avoids the press altogether, seeing as Morrison can do his job for him by just existing.

Unfortunately, his promise to continue his responsibilities as an alternative prime minister have quickly become thwarted by his lack of knowledge of computers, which he readily admits he has a ‘rather amateur understanding of.’

Using his home desktop computer mostly to type documents, email and play the odd game of Solitaire, Albanese was reportedly left feeling both confused and frustrated as he tried to source a hole to plug his web camera into. Nor did he know how to load the ‘Zoom program’ seeing as his Netscape was unable to load anything with images, let alone video.

“Flip!” grumbles Albo as he tries to jam the camera cord into the speaker hole, “sod it!”

Turning the keyboard upside down to see if there were any holes there, Albo concedes that it must have some kind of wireless capability and hopes for the best.

More to come.


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