Local News

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local woman has been unable to escape her mental illness, after making the mistake of signing up to Quora.com roughly one year ago. Leah Bhatt reports that she’d been googling anxiety when she’d stumbled upon ‘Quora’, a question and answer site that took over the much beloved Yahoo Answers. Explaining to our reporter that she doesn’t even remember...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local graphic designer is believed to be gearing up for a big day steering his Macintosh Computer, frocking up in a fresh pair of workman's style overalls. Once the uniform of iron lung steelworkers, this morning local branding specialist Albert Markson was spotted in the French Quarter dressed in a new pair of heavy-duty Carhartt dungarees. Whilst...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactAttendees at Betoota Height’s most popular yoga studio ‘Yoshi Flow’, have all shared similar thoughts during class this morning, after someone who was a little too flexible decided to put on a show. The class are reported to have collectively felt pretty good about themselves for just turning up, seeing as the chilly mornings made it especially hard to...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA woman who’s all but officially moved into a bloke’s house has had trouble getting the girlfriend label, despite doing everything that one would agree constitutes as ‘being in a couple.’ Violet Hale tells our reporter that she’s been dating Ian for almost a year now but that every time she asked to progress the relationship, she’d been met...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A man was seen bowling as fast as his body would let him this afternoon at the Machattie Park cricket nets in the Old City District, which caught the attention of onlookers as it's almost the middle of winter. Cutting a lonely figure between his explosive acts of locomotion, Cameron Staynes, of the French Quarter,...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A Betoota Heights landlord has today shown his softer side, confirming that he’s not always a capitalistic, greedy douchebag intent on using any opportunity to suck out every last possible cent from his tenants. James Greer had managed to snap up four properties across the span of three decades by using the equity on his first home, which...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local woman has today learned the hard way that men and women’s razors do differ and that it’s not simply a marketing ploy or a scam to get her to pay more money. This realisation is said to occur when Zoe Henderson’s trusty Venus started showing telltale signs of rust, and she found herself reaching for her boyfriend...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTA restless boomer might need to take her shoes to the cobbler, after spending the morning tapping her feet so hard her heels will need to be resoled.Enjoying an extended vacation in the quaint seaside town of Bargara, this morning Helen Peters (62) was spotted putting on a broadway song and dance equivalent to the energetic...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTAs time continues to move forward, every middle class member of the human race must roll up their sleeves and accept the fact that they will one day be forced to endure a drunken slurp of an excuse of a Best Man speech.Named for the public toast given by the Groom's elected peer representative, Best Man speeches are...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactDating can be tough but for Julianne, it’s tougher - especially as she has trouble finding someone she knows with 100% certainty is gay who hasn’t already dated half of her friendship circle.  Dipping the toe in the water every now and then by complimenting the odd chick on their outfit choice, haircut or double-barrelled earring, which had about...