Politics

Uh Oh… Local Personal Trainer Has Been Doing A Bit Of Reading About The Virus Online

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT With each major city constantly in and out of never-ending lockdowns, the delusional fringes of society are gaining more members every day. The unfortunate reality that Australians find themselves in due to incompetent governance and a colossally bungled jab roll-out has resulted in vast numbers of disenfranchised workers steering away from the advice of medical experts and seeking...

PM: “We Wish It Were Different… About Wilcannia This Time”

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Self-described "Cheif Goonya" of Australia, Scott Morrison, has expressed his "sorrow" and "anguish" over the news today that the spicy cough outbreak in the western NSW town of Wilcannia is getting worse by the day. Mr Morrison spoke candidly to reporters this morning in a courtyard in Parliament House. He spoke slowly and with purpose, despite...

NSW Government Suggest Cases Could Be As High As 26000 Today In Order To Cover Their Own Arse

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The NSW Government is preparing to cover its own arse this morning as the situation they have created on their own has spiralled out of control. "There could be as many as 26 000 new cases today," said a worker within the NSW Premier's Office. "Anything less would be good news but there's still people out...

Report: Just Shut Up Mate. You Aren’t Helping

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Despite the the Murdoch newspapers and Sky News working their rings out to protect the Morrison government from any form of criticism, it seems that not even the manipulation of 70% of Australia's media market has been able to stop the public's very obvious shift against Scotty From Marketing. This comes as Melbourne extends their lockdown another two...

Canavan Forced To Ramp Up His Coal Miner Dress Ups After Disrespecting Our Returned Servicemen

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Senator Matt Canavan has had to rub an extra handful of soot on his face today, as he ramps up his working class man costume today, after accidentally revealing how little of a fuck he gives about anyone who wasn't raised with a silver spoon in their mouth like he was. Canavan, who was born on the Gold...

“Things Are Going To Get Worse,” Says Gladys While Addressing Her Slip In The Polls

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT During her daily dose of discomfort, NSW Premier Gladys Berijiklian provided real assurance to her state's 8+ million residents by telling them “things are going to get worse.” As the Sydney delta outbreak continues to chart over 400 new infections today, the Premier of New South Florida has been shocked to see the only decreasing metrics seem to be...

PM Rejects $300 Jab Bonus: “There’s No Cash Here. Here, There’s No Cash. Alright? Cash! No!”

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing has today held strong against the growing demand for a $300 jab incentive, as his bungled roll-out continues to see Australia's immunisation rates trailing last in the list of OECD nations. The Federal Opposition Leader, whose name is Anthony Albanese, has proposed the payment as a way to ramp up the jab roll-out,...

300 Bucks Or The Trolley Pole, It’s Your Call Brutha

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Scotty From Marketing continues to skirt around the big jobs today, as the Greater Sydney outbreak continues to spread right across the state. With a large wack of aged care, disability and prison workers still not vaccinated - today's case numbers have seen some really inspiring developments. Namely, a prisoner has contracted the virus in Bathurst prison from an...

Hem Hem… Less Talky, More Three Hundji

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT With nothing positive to report to the nation after 6 months of shifting jab-roll-out targets and some very concerning climate change reports being tabled by the UN, Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing is running out of chook feed to throw to the media. With no more Olympics to distract us from his the fact that a vast majority...

Nation Not Writing Off Possibility Of This Bloke Somehow Managing To Fuck Up Tonight’s Census

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT With our Federal Government once again tasked with rolling out a slightly logistical programme that requires clear messaging and engagement with the Australian population, there is very little confidence that things will go as smoothly. In fact, Australians say the only thing they have confidence in right now is Scotty From Marketing's ability to fuck up tonight's census. Australia's...

Social

781,079FansLike
603,780FollowersFollow
97,905FollowersFollow

Breaking News