Politics

Struggling Aussie Casinos Plead With Politicians To Remember The Little Guy And Bail Them Out

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation's State and Federal Governments have once again been asked to think to consider the human impact of the Covid-19 shutdown today. This comes after our struggling mum and dad operated casinos pleaded with them to think of the little guys and offer up a large stimulus...

Man Who Never Has And Never Will Face Consequences For Actions Terrified Of ‘Cancel Culture’

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A fading intellectual who once used to smoke pot and listen to TISM, while discussing a range of alternative economic and political theories with his flatmates in university, has today given up on the concept of political correctness. After several failed publishing deals and a couple of messy divorces,...

Barnaby Spends Entire Grocery Trip Wondering How Tamworth Shopping Centre Got That Car Inside

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT As he pushes a slightly skewed trolley through the fresh produce aisle, Barnaby Joyce finds himself lost in thought. Not because he’d had a particularly stressful day at the office, mind you. No, he just can’t stop wondering how the hell Centrepoint Tamworth got that car inside.

Israel Folau Continues Work On Retirement Plan As Sky News After Dark Host

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Israel Folau has continued working on setting himself up for a life after football by putting another feather in his cap as a potential Sky News After Dark Host. The former Wallaby who said 'hell awaits gay people' has now controversially refused to take a knee in solidarity...

Scott Morrison Names Michaelia Cash As The Newly Created Minister For Karens

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Praise, hope and high expectation have followed the appointment of Western Australian senator Michaelia Cash as Minister for Karen Affairs in the new Morrison government. Senator Cash is the first Karen to hold the newly created federal ministry, and the first woman to go through a can-of-Schwarzkopf-Strong-hold-per-day to sit...

Government That Accuses CSIRO Of Lying Every Election Shocked Nation Rejects Science On Masks

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Federal Government is today shaking its head at the level of debate surrounding masks and their role in preventing the spread of the deadly Covid-19 virus. This comes as masks become mandatory as of midnight tonight in Melbourne, and epidemiologists urge a blanket rule on mandatory mask-wearing...

PM’s New JobTrainer Scheme To Involve Selling Exclusive Line Of Government Multi-Vitamins

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Federal Government has today announced the latest in it's set of 'Job' schemes, revealing an elaborate Multilevel Marketing program to help people get through these tough times. Following in the wake of the JobKeeper, JobSeeker and JobMaker - Scott Morrison has unveiled JobTrainer - a new...

Faded Frosty Burn Peeking Out From Underneath Rolled Up Sleeve Hints At Bad Boy Past

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT Though you wouldn’t have picked it by just looking at him, local suit Mark Latham had some semblance of a personality. Once. But now, as the leading hedge fund manager for a top financial consulting company, Mark has had his personality chipped away the higher he’s climbed up the...

Real Estate Agent Looking Cunt Somehow Still Making A 2nd Wave Seem Better Than The Liberals

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Maverick Victorian Liberal MP, Tim Smith has continued to somehow make the state opposition feel like the worse option, in the face of an unprecedented disaster that one would assume could only make them look good. This comes as the red-wine-swishing Scotch College prodigy continues to work towards his...

Rio Tinto, Santos And Fortescue Scissor Paper Rock Off For Who Has To Take Matthias Cormann

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Mathias Corman has formally announced that he will be retiring from politics causing somewhat of a headache for the Government, and the private sector. The Finance Minister who is abandoning the sinking ship after leading the country into its first recession on 30 years, announced over the weekend...

Social

754,864FansLike
603,780FollowersFollow
73,033FollowersFollow

Breaking News