Breaking News

2 Weeks Of Non Stop Rain Causes Sydney Man To Develop Geordie Accent And Skin Fade Haircut

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT Local Sydney man Matty Thompson (31) has emerged from two weeks of non-stop rain not only with a newfound Geordie accent but also sporting a sharp skin fade haircut - and the phenomenon has shocked friends and family. The unprecedented weather phenomenon has left scientists wondering how such heavy rainfall could have caused a change in accent and hair...

Dreyfus Tells Jailed War Crimes Whistleblower To Consider Himself Lucky He Didn’t Get Boeing’d

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Attorney General Mark Dreyfus has today offered up a stern warning to any Australians thinking about trying to shine a light on some of the darkest parts of our society. The man in charge of our legal system has told former army lawyer and whistleblower David McBride that he should consider himself lucky for only getting 5...

Shadow Treasurer Accuses Jim Chalmers Of Slapping Name On Group Budget Surplus Assignment He Had Nothing To Do With

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation's Opposition has today levelled some heavy criticism at the current party in power. Shadow Treasurer Angus Taylor has furiously fronted the media this morning to accuse the Labor Party of trying to steal his homework. Hailing from the self-proclaimed 'superior economic management party,' Taylor has declared to the nation that he is the victim of plagiarism. "The...

Joey Spotted Putting Up A Few Torpies In NSW Blues Kit Following String Of Injured Playmakers

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT With the State of Origin series rapidly approaching, the head honchos in the New South Blues have been forced to consider a drastic measure. After the Women's Blues sprung some huge selection changes in the form of veteran playmaker Rachael Pearson earning a recall for this Thursday night's Game One in Brisbane, the Men's team are now also...

Europe Chooses Most Neutral Country To Win EuroVision As Continent Teeters On Brink Of War

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The landmass of Europe has this weekend chosen to pursue the most amicable resolution to a major continental showdown. With the annual Eurovision song contest taking place in the second most neutral country in Europe, the most neutral country came away as victors. Hosted by Sweden in Malmo, Switzerland won the contest, edging out Croatia 591 votes to 547....

Rockhampton Hospital Inundated With Drunk Farmers Who Just Realised E-Scooters Are More Dangerous Than Horses

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Central Queensland's health system is this week buckling under the strain of a new phenomenon. Rockhampton Base Hospital has confirmed to The Advocate that they've had to call in staff from all around the state to help deal with the inundation of hospitalised bushies missing a bit of bark. The medical facility has seen an overwhelming number of...

Interest Rate Hike To Curb Corporate Profiteering And Global Markets By Pushing Ordinary People Over Mortgage Cliff

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Some of the bright minds in charge of managing our economy are set to meet today to discuss what to do with interest rates. Many in the know believe that the Reserve Bank of Australia may keep the cash rate on hold this afternoon, but more hikes are inevitable in the short term. The impending hikes will of course...

“Legalize It” Says Bloke Carrying On At Nimbin Mardi Grass Like It Was Ever Illegal To Begin With

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A young man from NSW's fabled Northern Rivers has confirmed that he's still recovering today, after a quite a large weekend. The young free spirt who has an on and off again relationship with employment confirmed to The Advocate that Nimbin's Mardi Grass festival has really taken it out of him. "Brother, what a fucking weekend," laughed the...

Cute! New 29 Year Old Engineer Thinks He’s Going To Performance Manage 54 Year Old Road Crew Veteran

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In an adorable story from a few kilometres outside of a Betoota, a young civil engineer is making quite the name for himself. The young man is reportedly trying to leave a sizeable imprint on the Betoota Municipal Council's Road Crew, it can be confirmed today. Shipped up from Brisbane a few weeks ago, Ethan Skinner (29) confirmed...

Social

781,079FansLike
603,780FollowersFollow
119,365FollowersFollow

Breaking News