ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A holidaying Betoota Grove native has been told to go elsewhere today after trying and failing to gain access to the Lake Betoota Surf Club while wearing a pair of Bangalow Riding Boots.

The 30-year-old-full-time-stay-at-home-son-of-some-cunt explained to the Club’s security that they weren’t just any unclosed shoe, they were Teva’s which the man said were more than just sandals.

“They’re sports sandals,” said Murray Fergus to the bouncer.

“They’re orthopaedic.”

The bouncer told them he didn’t give a fuck what they were, they weren’t allowed in the surf club because he could see his toes.

Murray told the bouncer again that they weren’t just cheap sandals, they were Teva’s.

“Sir, I understand what you’re saying but these are sports sandals. They’re appropriate surf club attire.”

The bouncer pointed to the sign on the door that said “closed shoes only” and “no sandals” and explained to Murray that he’d have to go and find some closed shoes if he wanted to come in for a low-carb beer and a hamburger.

So Murray’s friends left him at the door and that was that.

More to come.


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