Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has today confirmed Australia’s acceptance into an illustrious club.

The travelling PM has revealed that we have been accepted into the Climate Club – an international group made up of a bunch of countries all over the world, but mostly Europe.

The Climate Club, which started in the parking lot of a local bar, aims to push governments to put a minimum price on carbon and impose import taxes on countries that don’t put a price on carbon.

It is also designed to push back against global consumerism and allow angry politicians a sense of fulfillment and release that comes with brawling over climate policy.

However, Albanese has been informed about the first and biggest rule of Climate Club: You need tell everyone about Climate Club.

It doesn’t matter if it’s a random person in your car sales job, or someone in your universal tutorial, you must constantly tell them about your climate activism.

Speaking to The Advocate from a random bar’s basement somewhere in Delaware, Prime Minister Albanese says he’s excited for what the future holds.

“You are not your job, you’re not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the car you drive. You’re not the contents of your wallet. You are not your fucking khakis. You are all singing, all dancing crap of the world,” said Albanese.

“But we can do something by spreading the word of the Climate Club.”

The Advocate then asked when Albanese got so shredded, which he refused to comment on.

More to come.


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