WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact

The manufacturers of the world’s most scandal prone airline have today looked to hose down some negative PR with a shiny new reveal.

Boeing have come forward to reveal an exciting new updated version of their 737MAX.

Featuring a total of 4 cabin windows and a rustiness appropriate for a 1985 Holden Astra that’s been left in the back yard of bush block on the edge of town, the 737MAXV2 has certainly raised eyebrows.

The timely release of the new plane comes after a Boeing 737 had to land after its engine cowling fell off and struck its wing flap during take-off on a flight from Denver.

The latest terrifying safety incident involving a Boeing plane follows a big few months of emergency landings and things like doors flying off planes while they are up in the air.

They also come a couple of years after two Boeings crashed in Indonesia and Ethiopia, killing 189 and 157 people respectively.

Given the locations of the crashed planes, the US company and US regulators have largely been able to ignore concerns about their aircraft.

Concerns have been raised by plenty staff – tens of thousands who have been fired as part of profit driven cost cutting procedures – who say safety concerns aren’t being listened to and corners are being cut in the manufacture of the aircraft.

One staff member was whistleblower John Barnett who worked for Being for 30 years before quitting over safety concerns around the aircraft.

Amongst of a raft of concerning things like 1 in 4 oxygen masks not working, he told the BBC “that under-pressure workers had been deliberately fitting sub-standard parts to aircraft on the production line,” before testifying as a whistleblower in a lawsuit against Boeing.

Days after giving evidence in court about the concerning practices at the world’s major airline manufacturer (in 2017, a couple of years before people died as a result of Boeing planes crashing) – Barnett was found dead in a motel room – with police stating that he had ‘suffered a self inflicted gun wound to the head.’

However concerns about the safety practices and the influence of Boeing over law makers and regulators in the United States have now all been hosed down by the release of a new, updated Boeing 737MAXV2.

“Looks pretty flash hey,” said a Boeing spokesperson.

“Only needs like 20-25 roles of duct tape to hold it together.”

“Safe as investment returns on houses in an Australian Capital city,” he finished, slapping one of the wings and immediately dislodging a sheet of metal.

“Don’t worry about that, it’s all good.”

More to come.


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