ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Prime Minister Scott Morrison has confessed he wasn’t to blame for the human disaster that was RoboDebt – telling the media for the first time that he has a twin brother, Greg, who was ultimately behind the scheme.

“This is very difficult for me,” said Morrison via video link to the National Cabinet this afternoon.

“I have a twin brother that I’ve hidden from you; that I’ve hidden from all Australians. His name is Greg and Greg is an evil man. He assumed my indentity when I was Minister for Social Services and put in motion the RoboDebt Scheme. When I was Treasurer of Australia, that was actually Greg. He did the sums on RoboDebt, he did the income averaging that brought everything unstuck,”

“Both ASIO and ASIS have been looking for Greg ever since. Last we heard of him, he was pretending to be me again. This time, he was trying to gain access to the Chairman’s Box at the Rugby Union World Cup in Japan last year. Which was a huge error, because I’d never go and see the Wallabies these days. Greg is the rugby head, I’m a leaguie,”

“And now that we’ve cleared this up and I’ve actually revealed myself to be the real victim in this whole RoboDebt scandal, can we just move on? Who’s ready for some Test cricket?”

When asked if Greg Morrison had an international arrest warrant out for his arrest, the Good Morrison declined to provide comment.

More to come.


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