The Nation

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Coalition Government have today announced that they are now ready to hand over to Labor, after even the Russians have deciding against electing them. This comes after a Prime Minister Morrison took an overnight flight to Moscow from Mt Isa on Sunday, to meet with President Putin. "Come on Vlad, mate" begged The Nightwatchman. "You can have free reign on...

RICK MOSS | Culture | CONTACT In a desperate bid to resurrect their once wholesome and family friendly image, the NRL have today decided to spend big dollars on flying out some of the biggest recording artists in music history for the 2019 NRL Grand Final. This comes after an absolutely chaotic off-season that has resulted in roughly 66 different reported off-field scandals. The NRL's...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A gifted and talented youngster at Saint Brett's Cathedral School in Betoota Heights has told The Advocate this afternoon that even after he aces his high school leaving exams and his university degree, he's still optimistic about failing to live up to the high expectations his friends, family and community have placed on his...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact For a brief moment earlier this year, a local man let himself believe that this year was going to be his year. Instead, he says, he's started to make his own hot sauces that he gives out to friends in the hope that they too will start the hobby. When instead they barely say thank you...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Nightwatchman of Australia has fronted reporters today in Canberra where he answered a number of questions surrounding the alleged cyber attack on Parliament House last week. Scott Morrison revealed this afternoon that the Parliament's servers where compromised by a 'sophisticated state actor' in part because nobody had updated the server's Norton Internet...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Looking to keep the party going, a mildly unpopular city worker hasn't given his sickly meat bag of a body a rest since Friday night because today he elected to have a full-fat Coke with a greasy lunch special. Sam Gonstor typically has water with his meals because he has some self-respect for himself...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An noticeably overweight man wearing jeans and joggers on the beach has today sparked a wave of confusion for nearby sunbakers today, after giving the impression that he was punching unrealistically high. The rotund loudmouth was seen dragging some sort of wheely briefcase through the sand, while nonchalantly ordering around what many believed to be his other half. Ken,...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The South-East Corner's construction industry are today reorganising their project timelines around the fact that they won't be able to get a roofer on any sites for the next four days. This follows a the news that a tropical low, formerly lingering off the coast of Cairns in the Coral Sea last week, has now formed into a...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Political hopeful Clive Palmer has today announced that he's permanently moving to the New Caledonian capital, Nouméa, in his latest bid to make Australia 'great' again. The flighty Victorian explained to reporters this morning in Coolum that he's been thinking about it for a while and has come to terms with the fact the political...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Betoota Heights mother-of-three has taken to social media this afternoon to urge the rest of our town to do their own research into infant carseats and capsules. Butter Hibiscus, a civil engineer specialising in concrete during the day and a 'mummy blogger' by night, said that she's exercising her right as a mother not...