4 May, 2016. 15:34
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
IN A RARE LAPSE OF judgement, former treasurer turned ambassador Joe Hockey was seen throwing a television off a fourth story balcony yesterday as Scott Morrison delivered his first address on the nation’s chequebook.
The Dick Smith brand 52-inch plasma was about to receive a National Heritage seal for being an exceptionally rare bit of electronic kit in light of the four-eyed-Dick going into receivership.
Those in the embassy lobby narrowly missed being hit by the falling television, with one witness telling local police that she thought she heard a loud thumping and a disorderly string of vulgar and horrible language unfit to print before the television landed in the courtyard.
The Advocate attempted to contact Ambassador Hockey’s office this afternoon but the only reply we got was a photograph of spit on some carpet that looked as if it’d been stamped in with a foot.
It is unknown what caused the barnstorming 50-year-old to react the way he did, but what’s for sure is that this cleanup operation will go well into the morning.
But another big Catholic in Canberra has lashed out at Hockey, saying his rampant and shameless destruction of a heritage-listed television shouldn’t go unnoticed.
Bill Shorten today said that Joe needs to pay for the replacement and damage out of his own pocket.
“How many Dick Smith branded televisions do you think are left in the world? Huh?” said Shorten, lying down in the boot of his com car, staring up at the sky.
“There’s fuck all, mate. I’ll tell you that for free. I mean, he could’ve gone ham on the curtains with a fire poker or slashed Kim Beazley’s portrait in the smoking room. Anything. Anything except throw the Dick Smith plasma off the balcony.”