ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A number of employees Virgin Australia’s Bowen Hills HQ have taken the news that the network has entered receivership this afternoon quite badly and have proceeded to start stripping the copper wiring from the ceilings and walls.

The dramatic scenes come as many staff don’t know if they’re going to get paid this month, despite senior executives and administrators telling them that it’d ‘be as close to business as usual as possible.’

A panic happened shortly after the announcement this morning from the Virgin board that the company could not secure a government bailout or private equity to recapitalise the $5bn debt that’s been threatening to derail the business since the coronavirus outbreak began, which lead to employees fighting it out for the remaining assets such as Lenovo ThinkPads and Sunbeam appliances from the Velocity Store.

One employee described the scenes to The Advocate, saying that he’s never seen such a depraved frenzy.

“You’ve got people climbing over each other like it’s the last days of Rome,” said an insider.

“Swinging fire axes at cabling and computers, it’s absolute bedlam. Internal security staff have evacuated the executives who caused this mess, leaving us peasants to fight it out for what’s left,”

“There’s a running battle in the Velocity Store storage downstairs at the moment. It sounds like the First Day of the Somme down there. I can see Murray from HR swinging a Breville toaster like a bommy knocker. Jesus Christ! He’s just smashed Glenn in the mouth and his veneers have gone everywhere! Oh my God! The police are going to have to shoot him!”

“Please send hel…” they said, shortly before the landline went dead.

More to come.

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