LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Always happy to pay his mother a visit, Ryan Carlile (34) wasn’t expecting such a warm reaction from his mother, Lucile Carlile (58), in regards to his ‘hip new sandshoes.’

“Oooh, they look comfortable! What’s the writing on the side? Aren’t they flash!”

According to Ryan, his mother does not know his new ‘sand shoes’ are a $350 pair of Yeezys designed by rapper Kanye West and doubts she even knows who Kanye West.

“She keeps calling them sandshoes as if they’re like the crappy no-brand ones she used to buy when I was a kid. I would never play handball in these, I’d get them dirty!”

Upon explaining the concept of Yeezys and Kanye West to his mother, her attitude about her son’s ‘sand shoes’ shifted from doting to highly critical.

“So Kane West [sic] told you to buy these shoes for $350 so you just did it! Is he the one married to the Kardashian woman? I don’t know if I like his music, disrespectful to women isn’t it?”

While unable to understand her son’s purchase, Lucile Carlile insists she is not out of touch and that the fault lies with her son for spending his hard earned money on a pair of kids shoes.

“I think he cares it a bit too much about being trendy! If I was one of his Tinderer dates [sic] I would be pretty upset if he turned up wearing sand shoes, to say the least. Even if they do look pretty groovy!”

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