ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Federal Government was ‘surprised’ today when the ABC voted to give themselves a pay rise, given the current economic climate isn’t conducive to extra spending.

Scott Morrison said to the media today in Canberra that we all need to do the right thing at the moment – even the ABC.

“I’ve seen how much these people at the ABC get paid and quite frankly, it’s a bit much considering that all of us are hurting,” said Scott.

“And we’re the ones paying them. You and me, the taxpayer,”

“So when those tram-riding Albo lovers asked for another pay rise today, I was surprised, you know. I thought they liked socialism. They’re taking from us and giving us back wrinkle brain television like The Drum. I don’t know, but I think that’s a bit rich. Coming from this old Cronullafornia bus-riding boogie boarder. You might be able to see my nipples through my rash top, but you can’t pull the wool over my eyes.”

The ABC hit back at the government shortly after Mr Morrison spoke to the media.

A representative from the Public Servant & Pork Pie Hat Union (PSPPHU) said that the ABC will turn down a pay rise the day that our nation’s politicians do the same thing.

“Scott Morrison is one of the highest-paid world leaders,” said Bernice Keepnewtown-Weird.

“His government and the one before him – and the one before that one have slashed our funding every single budget. So fuck them,”

“We acknowledge that these times are tough and the government needs to curtail spending somewhat but cutting it from the wages of ABC workers is just not on,”

“It’s like they’ve never heard of the SBS before. If there has to be cuts, it should be there first.”

More to come.


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