Phins Agree To Carry The Weight Of Queensland On Their Shoulders After Qualifying For Finals
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Dolphins are this evening enjoying the greatest night in the club’s history (so far)
Latest news (Page 8)
Naarm Becomes Melbourne Again As Random White Man In A Suit Now More Electable Than Leftie Girlboss
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Naarm era is over, it has been confirmed. The late 2010s/early 2020s phenomena that
Jacinta Allan Quits To Spend More Time With Her CFMEU
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Victorian Premier Jacinta Allan has this morning announced she is stepping aside as leader of the
Outback Aboriginal Radio Station Under Fire For Nearly 20 Minutes Without A Troy Cassar-Daley Song
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A remote Aboriginal radio station deep within the Diamantina Shire has called an emergency meeting with
Jacinta Allan Attempts To Fend Off Leadership Challenge With Stunning Rendition Of Melbourne Sound
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT After months of plummeting approval ratings, Jacinta Allan’s future as the Victorian premier currently hangs
Labor Loses Next Generation Of Voters After Fucken Albo Snitches On Schoolkids For Bringing Phones To Class
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Albanese Government has turned an entire generation of Gen Alpha voters off ever voting for
All Hail Supreme Leader Anthony Albanese. Your Microchip Has Been Activated. Modern Life Is Wonderful And Prosperous
WENDELL HUSSEY | Big Brother Spokesperson Welcome to the future. If you are reading this, life is good. If it is
Well That Was Kind Of Exciting
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Despite all of the carry-on from the cookers about invasions of privacy and intrusive government
Commonwealth Receives Quadrennial Reminder They Are That Shit
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Australians are giving it to the rest of their Commonwealth brothercousins in Scotland
Glasgow Thriving With The Economic Boost That Dan Andrews Denied Regional Victoria
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A solemn mood has swept across regional Victoria today - as the people of Gippsland, The Grampians
Lifting Of The 'Mayo Curse' Gives St Kilda Fans Hope That Maybe, Just Maybe, One Day, Well We Don't Wanna Jinx Anything, But
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A long, long, long suffering Saints fan has begun the week with a new found pep
One Nation Announce Policy Of Banning Dads From Doing Bed Time And Changing Nappies
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact One Nation is speaking the language of many men around the country this week
Anyone Vowing To Turn Their Phone Off To Avoid The Frequencies Of The AusAlert Could Actually Probably Benefit From Turning Their Phone Off
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT For that once very noisy cohort of Australians that wade in the waters of the lowest