After providing written evidence that their legal team had a quicker turn around than their app developers, the fun-loving larrikin of predatory online gambling was tragically euthanised yesterday afternoon.

This followed earlier reports that Sportsbet had crashed nationwide in the lead-up to the Melbourne Cup, the busiest betting event of the year.

Both problem gamblers and once-off punters who haven’t yet developed an addiction were left temporarily unable to place bets on their smartphone apps or computers for up to two hours leading into the biggest horse race of the year.

While the issues are believed to have been related to just some run-of-the-mill technical problems that most people would imagine a multinational sports betting company might have been prepared for, some punters have claimed that winning bets placed prior to the meltdown have since been refunded without explanation, other than the damage control ‘scheduled upgrade’ notification they received from midday right up until the jump.

In what is considered arguably worse than not being of any use for the two hours of the year that would validate its existence, Sportsbet later revealed that they are not particularly fond of having these issues highlighted, even in a jovial manner, after sending a stern legal letter to the editors one of Australia’s oldest and favourite regional newspapers.

If you would like to see the editors of this esteemed inland news organ live on stage in a town near you, make sure you pick up some tickets to our nationwide live show. The Betoota Advocate Roadshow! Tickets and locations can be found here: ROADSHOW TIX


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