The nation’s self-proclaimed economic managers have today reminded the nation that the lower classes need to remember their role in society.

This reminder comes after the Labor party backed calls for a 5.1% raise to the minimum wage, taking it from the $20.33 to an astronomical and crippling $21.37 an hour.

The shocking call to try to lift millions of Aussies a tiny bit higher above the poverty line, has been shot down by Scott Morrison and his government, who say calls for a raise like that are ‘reckless.’

Never ones to miss an opportunity to raise their own pay, Liberal and National politicians who piss money away on various rorts, schemes, and projects that don’t add up said we need to be careful with our money in a time like this.

“The cost of living has gone through the roof. My staffers have told me numerous times, and I am very aware of that,” said the Prime Minister who has been keen to act as if he is doing something about real-life survival pressures.

“But pushing to raise the wages of our working class will adversely affect business owners and people like me,” said Morrison today, who receives a daily travel allowance more than plenty of people earn.

“It’s all very good to request people get paid more, but the money has got to come from somewhere, and I think it’s pretty evident it shouldn’t be coming from the top end of town.”

“So, people are just going to have to tighten their belts a little and not get greedy.”

“We really do need to be careful with how we manage our money,” said the man whose government has frittered away 10s of billions on outdated submarines, billions on carpark, sports rorts, land and water rorts as well as things like 100s of millions on JobKeeper to profitable businesses to name a few.


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