The Nation

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The RSPCA has reminded pet owners around the country today that strict rules on dogs staying outside should be relaxed during thunderstorms. “We understand that many dogs around the country are classified as “Outside Dogs,” particularly in rural areas, and we respect that,” a statement said. “But for pity’s sake. Have a bit of a heart. You should relax...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A few short years ago, Marty Dollarhyde was playing Golden Oldies league with his old Betoota Dolphins teammates from the late 1960's. He's given that way now, his knees and hips are simply shot. But back then, that didn't stop the barnstorming 70-year-old from putting the shoulder into a broken body or two. His friends and family laughed and giggled when...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local girl, Kat Donald (27) has today posted a lovely Facebook tribute to her little brother Keiran on the day of his 21st. Well that's what her mum and auntys think. And anyone who loves them equally and see the natural beauty in them all. However, close friends of Kat's can see right through this ploy for social media...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A man who's parents decided to hack off the top of his penis for no reason other than the fact that they thought it is what everyone does, has today defended their decision. Male circumcision is the removal of the foreskin from the human penis. In the most common procedure, the foreskin is opened, adhesions are removed, and the foreskin is separated from the glans. "It's...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In what was a dramatic race, it has since been confirmed the hugger beat the handshaker to the greeting, in a meeting between two people who only kind of know each other. While both sides showed promise early on, the outstretched arms of hugger Lauren Smith, trumped the tentative centred hand of shaker Alex Barnes who was quickly...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A trendy inner-city burger bar is under fire for reportedly playing the same Wu-Tang Clan song for the 412th time in a row. Urban Burg opened their doors three months ago after owner Buster Krick (34) realised there was not an American style burger chain within 90 metres of their current premises. “The hip hop theme gives us a...

An entire room full of fully grown adults have been spotted yelling and clapping at a television in the Lord Betoota Hotel this afternoon. The patrons, who don't appear to be talking to one another, are fixated on a TV program based around roughly 13 men lightly exercising in the middle of a large patch of grass. "Woooo!" Yells one man. "Shot"...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Speaking candidly to The Advocate once he'd left his comfy Betoota Heights Queenslander, local father Malcolm Coolie said that while he's happy for his middle daughter - he's not rapt with the fact that she met him on popular dating app, Bumble. "It just rubs me the wrong way, you know what I mean?" said...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT What the fuck? A South Betoota woman has just chosen to make a purchase with a cheque account, what's the go there? After making a pretty run of the mill purchase of a tank of fuel, bottle of milk and some choccies, Mia Bouris (32) nonchalantly told the cashier that she wouldn't be using credit or savings today, but cheque. "She...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Lake Betoota duplex sold for nearly $200 000 above reserve over the weekend and that's got one local couple downhearted. Last Friday, they thought it was well within their half-million-dollar budget. Two young professionals with good jobs and no children, they say, should easily be able to service that mortgage. So did their bank...