WA farmers have reacted angrily to the Federal Government’s plans to end live sheep exports from 2028, as the Albanese Government scratches their leftie itch by publicly sacrificing the least politically connected agricultural producers who work with animals.

Labor’s Agriculture Minister Murray Watt has announced a four-year exit plan from live sheep exports with a total phase out by 2028 – which was apparently an election promise.

Sheep farmers say the ban is an attack on their livelihood and is nothing more than a cheap stunt to win inner-city votes at the next election, which is not an unreasonable assessment of a political landscape where 87 percent of the population lives within 50 kilometres of the coast, and everyone outside of that vast majority only ever votes for a now castrated National Party.

This is not an ideal situation for WA Sheep Farmers, with very little political capital, all they can do is hope people outside of their electorates vote for Peter Dutton – who says he’ll reverse the decision ‘if’ he gets elected next year.

However, the Ag minister says the farmers should be excited about futures, and other opportunities available to them,.

“I’m offering packages for anyone who wants to get out of sheep and into weddings!” he says.

“There’s more money in this shit than wool anyway”

Murray Watt’s previous career as a wedding planner was taken into consideration by Prime Minister Albanese when assigning the Queensland senator to the Agricultural Portfolio while in opposition, citing his experience in ‘working with his hands’ and ‘maintaining civilised dialogue with emotional subjects’

This experience has come in handy as Watt agrees the backlash he’s gotten from sheep farmers is nothing compared to some of the bridezillas he’s had to wrangle over the years.

“The difference is,” says Watt.

“In the wedding game, it’s father of the bride doing doing their arse. I’m here offering Western Australia’s sheep farmers the opposite of that. We all remember the wool crash – but the wedding game is a permanent boom.”

“You’ve got these princesses all hopped up on Instagram and magazines deciding to spend their inheritances on the perfect rustic wedding. Just replace the kiwi shearers with homosexual florists. The missus can even earn a bit extra to take the photos”

“This is the future our generational sheep farmers can look forward to”


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