Headlines

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Despite the the Murdoch newspapers and Sky News working their rings out to protect the Morrison government from any form of criticism, it seems that not even the manipulation of 70% of Australia's media market has been able to stop the public's very obvious shift against Scotty From Marketing. This comes as Melbourne extends their lockdown another two...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Senator Matt Canavan has had to rub an extra handful of soot on his face today, as he ramps up his working class man costume today, after accidentally revealing how little of a fuck he gives about anyone who wasn't raised with a silver spoon in their mouth like he was. Canavan, who was born on the Gold...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT If Scotty From Marketing thought there wouldn't be repercussions for relocating all of the jabs from Newcastle to Sydney while the Hunter Region was locked down, he was wrong. This comes as the Newcastle Knights, dressed in their heritage hi-vis jerseys, snatch a finals appearance from the hands of the Cronulla Sharks with a 16-14 win at Redcliffe...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT A local Betoota Ponds bloke has today arrived at the pub to launch himself into a few ice cold schooners and watch some live football on a giant television screens. This comes after a lovely afternoon at work on the construction site, where he is able to ply his trade as a glass balustrade installer without fear of...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing has today held strong against the growing demand for a $300 jab incentive, as his bungled roll-out continues to see Australia's immunisation rates trailing last in the list of OECD nations. The Federal Opposition Leader, whose name is Anthony Albanese, has proposed the payment as a way to ramp up the jab roll-out,...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT A WASTE OF DECK SPACE: The government has today aired growing concerns that not enough people are completing their civic duty to protect themselves from this virus. Australians in locked-down cities are being urged to protect themselves with that jab that the government initially didn't order enough of, and then scared them away from with fear-mongering politics, before...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT Scotty From Marketing continues to skirt around the big jobs today, as the Greater Sydney outbreak continues to spread right across the state. With a large wack of aged care, disability and prison workers still not vaccinated - today's case numbers have seen some really inspiring developments. Namely, a prisoner has contracted the virus in Bathurst prison from an...

STEVEY BENNETT | National Pulse | CONTACT The Federal Government has rushed to clarify that this week’s census is not a customer satisfaction survey after receiving a number of abusive responses from citizens across the country. In the midst of multiple lockdowns, piss-taking levels of corruption and a vaccine rollout with less jabs than Paul Gallen’s last fight, it seems the Liberal Government has...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT As the pandemic refuses to fuck off, the culture wars continue to rage in the leatherbound home offices of Australia's most elite inner-city commentators. A majority of the nation is currently unable to work and stuck in lockdown, a situation that has been caused by extremely incompetent governments at both state and federal levels. However, according to some of...

CLANCY OVERELL  | Editor | CONTACT With nothing positive to report to the nation after 6 months of shifting jab-roll-out targets and some very concerning climate change reports being tabled by the UN, Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing is running out of chook feed to throw to the media. With no more Olympics to distract us from his the fact that a vast majority...