When it comes to fashion, the guests at the 2018 ARIA Awards have certainly brought it.

So far we’ve seen frilly pink ensembles and champagne layered dresses, some dudes in suits, low neckline cocktail dresses, push up bras with bridal tails, couple more dudes in suits and of course linen jumpsuits!

However, while the women may be on top of their game, it’s the faceless industry execs that make this event.

This is where business gets done. Where the high cogs of the industry finally get the opportunity to meet.

This is where Sony sits down with Universal. Where Kingsmill sits down with Wilkins. Where the playmakers exchange knowledge.

In fact, fuck the dresses!

The most exciting thing we’ve seen on the red carpet tonight is a bunch of 90-year-old label executives discussing the benefits of this new thing called social media.

“It’s not bad, I hear” says iconic industry codger, Dennis Chugginski (99).

“Yeah. I’ve heard some of the musicians have been doing their own press with it! We don’t even need to put up posters anymore” says lifelong rival but equally as powerful, Michael Gudhandlin (98).

“Did you know you can put video clips up online on this FaceTube thing?” says Gudhandlin.

“We’ve actually signed a few kids that had only ever been played on the internet”

“It’s almost like the whole FM radio thing is losing it’s touch”

Both men paused for a second, before breaking out into laughter.

“Oh yeah… the internet’s the future you reckon?” chuckled Chugginski.

“Yeah… and let me guess you think newspapers are going to disappear by next year”

Both men patted each other on the back before walking into the venue to watch a performance by someone who was on Triple J unearthed eight months ago and has since been listed as a Falls Festival headline with just 20 plays on NOVA and 8k Instagram followers.


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