Local bowls club not sure if we’ve gone soft or the ‘$3 Schooners’ sign isn’t big enough

Local bowls club not sure if we’ve gone soft or the ‘$3 Schooners’ sign isn’t big enough



The South Bedourie Bowls Club have revealed to The Betoota Advocate today that they aren’t quite sure what’s going on.

They say that either the young generation of drinkers have gone soft, or that their marketing strategies aren’t up to scratch.

Club president Billy Galway (88) says the schooners haven’t changed price since he had his first drink at the club.

“What’s going on with these kids?” he says.

“We made a point of flat out ignoring the value of the Australian dollar and keeping the $3 schooner of beer a staple of our Western Queensland hospitality,”

“The only young blokes we can get in here are the ones that get banned from everywhere else – and they aren’t the most appealing crowd. Especially young Jake, he’s heading down the same road as his degenerate father”

“I reckon they’ve gone soft. First they banned the shoulder charge and now this? I knew it’d happen,”

However, Billy’s wife and club Treasurer, Gladys (83) says she’s certain that the kids can’t see the club specials behind the the Jacaranda tree on the main street.

“That’s got to be the reason. I’ve seen these kids at the races paying $8 for a can of two-stroke,”

“They must not realise they can get pissed in our club for the same price as a packet of smokes?”

Local drinker, Alf, has been drinking at the SBBC since he first moved to town in the 80s. He says the kids are most likely turned off by the amount of old people.

“Mate, they are probably just a bit shy of all these codgers,” he says.

“…Worried we won’t approve,”

“I’d tell them to not worry. I’ve seen more blokes piss their pants at this place than I did in Vietnam,”

“Not to mention the 34 pokie machines, TAB and Chinese Restaurant. Get involved you little pricks”

4 Responses to "Local bowls club not sure if we’ve gone soft or the ‘$3 Schooners’ sign isn’t big enough"

  1. Razzle   July 27, 2016 at 5:31 am

    my local has $5 happy hour schooners. If only I lived closer I would be 6 deep every afternoon on the way home from work

  2. Nath   July 27, 2016 at 11:03 pm

    $4.70 a schooner at the Cloncurry Bowls club have quite a few big nights with younger people involved. But yeah your dead right if there was a place around with $3 schooners tab & pokies when we were young fella’s we would’ve been there every week spending up big time. All I can say is these young ones have changed blame the internet and political correctness the world’s gone soft.

  3. Ross   July 29, 2016 at 11:14 am

    Yet another reason to move out to Betoota

  4. Dave   July 30, 2016 at 3:55 pm

    Maybe young people don’t want to hang out in a casino. Any organisation that can’t support itself without pokies deserves to go under.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.