Katter Calls For $120m Plebiscite On Whether Crocs Should Be Allowed To Eat North Queenslanders

Katter Calls For $120m Plebiscite On Whether Crocs Should Be Allowed To Eat North Queenslanders

KENT REGINALD | Entertainment | CONTACT Maverick MP Bob Katter has today renewed calls for a new $120 million plebiscite into whether crocodiles should be allowed to eat North Queenslanders or not. Katter stated, in a press release, that he believes it is every Australian’s right to have a say in whether or not North Queenslanders were worth keeping […]

No Campaign Blames Result On Lower Number Of No Voters

No Campaign Blames Result On Lower Number Of No Voters

In a decision that has shocked no one, over 70% of the Australian public voted in favour of legalising same sex marriage on the controversial postal survey. Across the country, the queer community and allies have joined together to celebrate the support against one of the last vestiges of inequality in the Australian constitution. One […]

Townsville Council Propose 80 Metre ‘JT The Redeemer’ Sculpture On Top Of Castle Hill

Townsville Council Propose 80 Metre ‘JT The Redeemer’ Sculpture On Top Of Castle Hill

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Townsville mayor Jenny Hill has today announced a proposal to erect a 328 ft soapstone statue of Cowboys captain and future rugby league immortal, Johnathan Thurston, on top of the iconic pink granite monolith ‘Castle Hill’ which overshadows the North Queensland capital. Modelled off the iconic art deco sculptor of Christ the Redeemer in Brazil’s Rio de Janeiro, […]

Tradies Conclude That Things Must Be Fucked As Engineer Lights A Durrie On Site

Tradies Conclude That Things Must Be Fucked As Engineer Lights A Durrie On Site

A fresh-faced and squeaky clean graduate engineer has raised eyebrows this afternoon after sparking a PJ Gold onsite. 23 yo Dustin Willoughby was seen with eyes closed inhaling deeply on the premium cigarette before exhaling with a cathartic “Ahh”. Site Foreman Shane Saunders was first to voice the sentiments of the mixed-trade bridge construction crew. […]

Torturous 12 Hours In Heels All Worth It For The ‘Picked A Winner’ Instagram Caption

Torturous 12 Hours In Heels All Worth It For The ‘Picked A Winner’ Instagram Caption

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local woman’s cheeky pun that draws parallels between horse-racing and her current relationship has made her Derby Day weekend all worth it. After a whole day in 30 degree weather, Lisa (30) has managed to keep herself together, unlike a lot of other young people binge-drinking in Flemington over the weekend. The […]

Sunday: Half-Pissed Local Man Haunted By Every Single Life Decision As Clock Nears 10pm

Sunday: Half-Pissed Local Man Haunted By Every Single Life Decision As Clock Nears 10pm

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A recently-single man who has attempted to drink his way out of three consecutive hangovers is tonight suffering an attack of the grog horrors, as the metaphorical brake-light of Sunday bed time catches up with him. As his mind races to unlikely hypothetical situations that could essentially ruin his life if they were […]

Woman Who Spoke Up About Sexual Assault Online Comforted By Man Telling Her Men Can Be Victims Too

Woman Who Spoke Up About Sexual Assault Online Comforted By Man Telling Her Men Can Be Victims Too

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact In an effort to raise awareness, local woman Leslie Tillard (26) shared her sexual assault story on social media and has since been met with an outpouring of support. One such statement of comfort came from Tillard’s friend Brian Pierce (28), who soothed Leslie’s pain by reminding her sexual assault also happens to […]

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