ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A locally-popular robot took to social media this week to brand the Queensland State Government’s plan to acquire struggling airline, Virgin Australia, as a financially-reckless decision and corrupt.
That is despite Peter Dutton, a cyborg that wears a coat of human skin where ever he goes, forgetting he owned a multi mullion dollar property in Townsville.
The Home Affairs minister blamed an administrative error for the omission, as politicians need to keep a register of all their investments and assets.
It comes after the same robot was forced to exclude themselves from a ‘family trust’ with interests in child care centres that received some funds from the Commonwealth.
In a rare interview with this masthead, Mr Dutton said that while his attempts to poison our reporters with radioactive tea, have them shot dead in a train station car park in a ‘random, senseless killing, or having their deaths ruled a suicide after their bodies were found in a state forest bound, gagged and shot twice in the back of the head with a small calibre pistol, he feels this paper is important to the national political discourse.
“A State Government shouldn’t own an airline,” he beeped.
“It should own things like railways and buses,”
“What is next? They are going to buy P&O? Hey Anastasia, I hear Microsoft is also for sale!”
It soon became apparent that our reporter was not talking to the real Peter Dutton, but another robot designed to make him seem more prime ministerial moving forward.”
More to come.
