As news spreads of Prime Minister Scott Morrison stating that he stands up for women, he’s now been forced to put his money where his mouth is and prove his allegience – which he’s now doing so with gusto.

The Prime Minister has sensationally become a feminist ally after revealing that he intervened in his party’s NSW pre-selection to protect “great women” within his ranks.

That revelation was made on the ABC’s 7:30 program, where Morrison said he controversially stepped in because he is “very serious about having great women” in his team.

Sticking to his ‘dorky dad’ persona, Morrison has so far been a tad irritating in his bid to curry favour with his female staffers, who really wish he’d just revert to the usual bullying as his constant disruptions are doing more disruption than good. 

Having just awkwardly interrupted a meeting to compliment a staffer on her impeccable fashion taste, Morrison is now focussed in creating an environment in which female staff feel comfortable talking about their womanly business. Or in his words ‘no sneaky tampon heists to the tut.”

It’s alleged Morrison was about to leave his desk to grab some chicken fingers from the hot section, when he checked in to see if there was anything else he could grab on the way.

“Alright girls, I’m feeling a little peckish so I’m off to Woolies. Anyone need any flood stoppers or anything?”

“Haha not if you’re Lismore right – HAHHA”

“But in all seriousness, this is a safe space girls, you can tell me anything.”

Raising his eyebrow as he looked around the room, Morrison didn’t let the silence discourage him.”

“You’ve been a bit silent today Samantha. I found when Jenny had her menses she’d be a little quieter than usual.”

“I’ll get mini and jumbo, so you don’t have to tell me which one haha.”

“Let me know if anyone wants a skirt check.”

More to come.


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