KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT

A casual pub lunch is about to be injected with chaos this afternoon, after a local sesh gremlin has learnt about the benefits of celebrating the Queen’s birthday in the middle of June.

Perched on a large picnic table at the Shoal Bay Country Club, north of Newcastle, The Advocate understands a gathering of nine former school mates is about to pick up some serious pace.

Looking around at the large crew of friends he rarely gets to see in the same venue, it’s believed local sesh Lord Kyle Eillot has finally joined the dots and realised why all his mates are back in ‘God’s Country’ for the weekend.

A Hunter Valley diesel fitter by trade, whose 5-on-4-off work roster rarely aligns with his friend’s life schedule, Kyle is reported to have perked right up upon learning he’s afforded the chance to get properly Sunday pissed with more than 10 people.

“Wait, how long are you guys in Newy for, don’t yas have to work tomorrow?” inquired Kyle.

“Bro, it’s a Public Holiday tomorrow…” laughed close mate ‘Pinger’ Edwards.

“Ahahaha why do ya think we’re all settling in” giggled ex-classmate Jordy Wallace.

Taking a quick look on his iPhone calendar to triple confirm the good news, witnesses say Kyle’s pupils began to dilate as he whispered to himself “Ahhhh, Queen’s Long Weekend…”.

Polishing off the final gulps of his lukewarm pint, Kyle reportedly told his mates he was off to the bathroom to ‘sort some stuff out’ and get another round.

Opening up his phone to transfer $600 from his savings account into his living account, The Advocate understands young Kyle is gearing up to give it a proper nudge, after seeing a large red neon sign advertising $7 Fireball shots.

Whispering to himself as he enters into the pungent wafts of the piss soaked bathroom, Kyle took a moment to thank the Royal family for giving him this Sunday luxury. 

“Mhmm, long live this Queen…”

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here