KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT

An unfortunate hostage situation is unfolding on the streets of Betoota Mall today after a local man decided he’d try out a new barbershop.

Strapped to a rotating chair and being forced to listen to top 40s commercial radio, local finance bro Sean Harrington is believed to be fearing for his life, as well as fearing for whatever the hell his new barber has done to his fringe.

As a high-flying executive who is a little precious about his hair follicles, Sean has a recurring monthly appointment locked in at Kingsman barbers in the French Quarter, a ritzy joint that charges $80 for a cut and wash and a nip of house whisky.

However after a week of travel got in the way of his beloved hour with his long-time barber ‘Marcus’, Sean was forced to get a touch up at Faydz 4 Days, a $20 joint in Betoota Mall owned by colourful local business identity Robbie ‘Glockman’ Griffith.

Having spent less than eleven minutes in the chair watching his new barber give him some sick speedlines, Sean was forced to pretend he was really happy with his experience or risk mutilation.

“You happy bro?” asked Robbie, aggressively clicking his scissors in the direction of Sean’s ear.

“Yes it’s ummm, it’s good,” lied Sean, beads of sweat dripping off his forehead.

“And I’ll book you in for next week yeah?” replied Robbie, as he took a free-hand razor to Sean’s throat and began nipping away at a few stray hairs.

“Yes yep, love to…” replied Sean nervously.

“Good idea bro, I’ll take your name, number and home address and put you in our system.” 

More to come.

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