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Aside from putting on a united front in the lead up to the Super Saturday by-elections later this month, Malcolm Turnbull has hit back at Tony Abbott the only way he can – by getting Jesus involved.

Earlier today, the Prime Minister called on the pope to sack disgraced Adelaide archbishop Philip Wilson after he was found guilty of protecting child abusers.

The festering bag of human shit refused to step down from his position until all avenues of appeal have been exhausted.

Declining to elaborate on his comments, the PM told The Advocate that he hopes the pope does the right thing by the victims.

“It’s the least God’s representative on this hellscape we call Earth can do,” he said.

“That’s all I’m going to say on that. Thank you.”

However, many in Canberra see the Prime Minister’s comments as a direct barb to the man he deposed as leader back in 2015.

One person qualified to speak on the conflict between the two men is Barnaby Joyce.

He took time out of his busy afternoon of chopping firewood and smoking to tell The Advocate first to go fuck themselves – but later relented and said he’d glad both of them are squirming.

“I couldn’t give two fucks,” he said.

“About those two or your newspaper. Actually, delete my number, you pack of bastards.”

Joyce then let out a long sigh.

“But it’s nice to see them both so uncomfortable. Anyway, I’ve got things to do. Never call me again, cheers.”

Our reporter reached out to Tony Abbott’s office for comment but each call went through to message bank.

More to come.


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