ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The alternate Prime Minister Peter Dutton appeared on the ABC’s Kitchen Cabinet last night and it’s upset a lot of people who think someone that slightly less than half the country will vote for at the next election deserves no air time on the national broadcaster.

So much so that host Annabel Crabb has thrown her phone in the sea. Lefties from all walks of life have attempted to reach out to the South Australian broadcaster via social media to express their dismay at the decision to invite him on Kitchen Cabinet. From unionised factory workers to the resin-jewellery-designer-dog-owning-inner-city-lefties that cross the street when they see homeless people. They are upset.

Nevertheless, Peter has shared his recipe with The Advocate this morning in case our readers would like to give it a go.

Peter Dutton’s Seafood Chowder

– 1 leek chopped (white part only. no brown bits. brown bits should go back to where the leek came from)

– 1 whole head of garlic, sliced in half. (to keep people on the left-leaning FODMAP diet away from it)

– 2 handfuls of good butter (anything but that Lurpak stuff that leftie’s go mad over)

– 1 bag of juicing carrots, boiled then mashed.

– 1 celery stick grated.

– 4 small potatoes peeled and chopped into batons (please send potato jokes to [email protected])

– 4 400gram cans of creamed corn (if you can’t find creamed corn, get corn kernals and crush them with a hammer)

– a pinch of White Ox (for the smokey flavour)

– 1 packet of frozen peas

– 2 pints of zero alcohol white wine (use alcoholic wine if you’re a pathetic drunk like any member of Labor’s left faction)

– 25 cans of Woolworths tuna

– 16 Vietnamese farm-grown green prawns peeled and chopped (make sure they’re covered in white spots)

– 1 piece of white fish cubed (no black fish or Muslim fish)

– 1 tube of Sensodyne toothpaste (mint for some spicey kick, spearmint if you’ve been inside a gay bar before)

– Salt and pepper

– More corn

– Chopped citrus leaves for garnish


1. Add butter, leek, celery and carrot to a large metal bucket. On a low heat melt the butter and cook the vegetables until shiny and the leek has softened like

2. Turn up the heat to high and scortch the potatoes on the bottom of the bucket, Sensodyne and pints of wine. Allow to boil gently until the potato is soft and minty flavour has had time to establish itself. Add White Ox.

3. With the pot on a low heat add the corn and peas. Allow to bubble gently for a few minutes.

4. Add prawns and tuna and stir to combine. Bubble gently for one minute to heat the frozen prawns and cook the peas through.

5. Add garlic and stir.

6. Add a generous amount of salt and pepper and add more corn to thicken. Add cubed white fish and top with citrus leaves (optional)


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