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19 August, 2016. 09:40 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Three days after Hollywood superstar Sam Neill slammed the NSW government’s “deeply regrettable” decisions to impose nightlife lock-out laws, Premier Mike Baird has responded with a vitriolic attack on the Jurassic Park actor's "moral fibre". Speaking to NOVA radio in Sydney this morning, Baird fired back at Neill's claims. "I think it's very rich...

16 August, 2016. 17:40 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews has been videotaped humming along Cypress Hill's 'Hits From The Bong' while inspecting the first crop of medicinal cannabis in a secret facility. The footage, which is the first time Premier Andrews has been 'officially' filmed alongside hydroponic kush since the 1970s, comes as the state’s first chair of...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Sydney woman, Clover O'Farrell (42), is still wearing her Sun-Herald City2Surf bib despite the fact that she crossed the finish line over 24 hours ago. The City2Surf is a popular road running event held annually in Sydney, Australia covering a 14 kilometres course. The event is a presented as a fundraiser for charity as well as a...

2 August, 2016 12:35 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Thousands of media-hungry, physically attractive and well-mannered Australian adults have today vowed to list Betoota, QLD as their hometown in the upcoming August 9th Census. In a show of national unity. The Betoota Advocate has today been informed by droves of readers that the once booming inland port of Betoota will now be listed as one of the...

26 July, 2016. 10:56 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact IN LIGHT OF RECENT SECURITY concerns ahead of the Rio Olympic Games, Australian Chef de Mission Kitty Chiller has unveiled the self-loading rifles that each of our Olympic heroes will be required to carry at all times when outside the athletes' village. After a Kiwi olympian was robbed at gunpoint over the...

25 July, 2016 16:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Northern Territory Government has today announced plans to stamp out as many cases of videotaped child abuse within correctional facilities as possibly, shortly after sacking Corrections Minister John Elferink in the wake of the damning ABC Four Corners report into the mistreatment of teenage prisoners. In response to the comments made by, the CEO of...

25 July, 2016. 14:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact WIPING AWAY THE TEARS as their daughter graduates at the top of her class, parents Bill and Amanda Batten-Shein couldn't be prouder watching Katie (23) shake hands with the Dean, who handed over her Bachelor of Laws and a bottle of Windex as they posed for the camera. "She's finally done it,"...

22 July, 2016 14:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Following both the Republican and Democratic Conventions, as well as the recent DNC wikileaks emails, political reporters from The Guardian are now trying their very best to cover the US Presidential election without acknowledging the fact that Donald Trump is almost a sure bet to win this thing. Speaking to the Betoota Advocate today, former...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A FOX SPORTS SOUND recordist's world has come crashing down around him this morning after learning that he's not fucking transparent and people can't see through him. Despite feeling invisible throughout high school and university, Michael Poon was able to keep his job after the sports network axed 4700 employees after Jarryd Hayne got dropped...

21 July, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Purple Monkey Dishwasher | Contact GREG POON THREW CAUTION TO the wind on his 40th birthday and decided to buy a motorcycle. Knowing full well that he could be turned inside out after even a minor accident, Mr Poon revealed he simply cannot wait until his liver gets a lashing from somebody else. "Yeah moit, me...