29 August, 2015. 16:45
ANTHONY SAHMELBAHN | Melbourne Correspondent | Contact
The Australian Border Force (ABF) has postponed Operation Fortitude, its inaugural visa blitz in Melbourne, this weekend due to “technical issues” with its foreigner detection dogs (FDD), said the Federal Government.
Operation Fortitude was to be a joint operation targeting visa fraud in Melbourne CBD including Victoria Police, Metro Trains, Yarra Trams and The Sheriff’s Office with freshly deputised Reclaim Australia activists providing support.
A new breed of Passive Alert Detection Dogs were slated for roll out during Operation Fortitude, however a training hiccup has forced the ABF to postpone their introduction to the public safety landscape.
According to the ABF these dogs are able to detect the contents of a passer-by’s intestinal tract and alert officers to any undesirable elements.
“These little puppies can smell what you ate at smoko (sic) last month,” ABF regional commander for Victoria and Tasmania Don Smith said.
“Anything these dogs bark at throws up an instant red flag for us. It suggests an undesirable element making the lifestyle choice not to be a valuable player on Team Australia.”
The FDDs were specially trained to detect hot curry spices and other “non-Australian” flavours while ignoring any person with Vegemite, VB or service station pie in their stomachs.
“The biggest challenge was getting the dogs to tell the difference between a good old butter chicken or tikka roll and that Afghani hellfire they put down over there,” ABF dog trainer Shane McWatts said.
“But we got there and I think it’s a pretty safe indicator of visa status. Only a true blue Aussie would eat a rock hard pouch of dog grade meat that’s been sitting in a tepid warmer for 12 hours plus, and that’ll stay in your system for decades.”
Unfortunately for the ABF this similarity between meat-pie filling and dog food was an unseen hiccup in the dog’s training. The FDDs were trained so effectively that they started ignoring their own food, resulting in mass starvation the Border Force hadn’t seen “since we started force feeding on Manus Island”.
Civil liberties advocates voiced concern with the new detection tool, terming it “Hitler’s dream weapon”.
“The potential for the misuse of this tool is extreme,” said Human Rights Commissioner Gillian Triggs.
“A drag net approach like this could see Jews, vegans or anyone unwilling to fork out five bucks fifty for a servo pie at risk of harassment, or even loss of citizenship under the government’s proposed legislation.”
A spokesperson for the Federal Immigrations Minister Peter Dutton MP denied this is an attack on Australian’s vegan community, but questioned if “we really want them here”.