19-Year-Old Enjoyed Reading His First Newspaper This Morning But Glad He Never Has To Do It Again

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A Betoota Heights teenager woke this morning to find his Facebook devoid of news content, forcing him to quench his thirst for journalism in more traditional means.

Just after rising at noon, Dylan Gooch walked to the corner shop on Hinze Link Road and Whiteshoe Avenue and picked up a Splice and The Betoota Bugle, our town’s last NewsCorp masthead.

He told our reporter this afternoon via TikTok that he, like his parents, only get their news from Facebook and the changes made to the platform overnight made that difficult.

“Tell you what, I didn’t mind reading the paper this morning,” he said.

“Yeah, you could say I enjoyed it. Curled up on the couch like a rich man’s cat. Cup of java in my hand. Pretty relaxing if you ask me. Not much in the Bugle, though. Just advertorials for car insurance and photoshopped pictures of Scott Morrison strangling Xi Jinping with an extension cord,”

“But yeah, now Facebook is coming back to the table. I don’t need to read this stupid paper thing anymore.”

More to come.