Australia’s dominant first day of the first Test against the West Indies in Adelaide has gone down as well as everyone thought it would, aside from opener Steve Smith’s first innings ending early.

The Windies were bowled out for 188 not long after tea, and Smudge wasn’t too far behind them after being dismissed for 12.

As Australia bat it out today, the general consensus is that the Adelaide Test probably won’t go down to the wire – despite a valiant effort by the underfunded former powerhouse.

While the potential for an early finish to this test might be upsetting for the South Australian cricket tragics who’ve taken a week off work, Adelaide’s Nightclubs are preparing for the arrival of twenty blokes that can make use of their empty dance floors.

Known across Australia as a rather stiff city with deeply religious undercurrent, the city of Adelaide is only ever treated to a pumping d-floor every 4 to 5 years. When the Windies tour.

With a squad of young Caribbean gentlemen expected to take an early shower tomorrow or the next day, both the hospitality professionals and single girls of Adelaide wait with baited breath.

Cory Pyne, owner and operator of the iconc Ten Pound Pom’s Plums Hotel in Hindley Street says he’s looking forward to the boom in business when the Windies eventually hit the sheds.

“The men is this city don’t often dance. Unless it’s some kind of weird religious ceremony” he says.

“But with twenty odd island lads on the dance floor, this place transforms into a video clip”

The publican says since the last visit from the Windies in 2018/19, the last recorded example of dancing in his city was when the US Marines were on R&R early last year.

“I’ve got all the playlists ready. I’m thinking I’ll warm them up with some Farnsy, then move into Barnsy, followed by some Guy Sebastian and then some Hilltops”

“Our homegrown music translates well onto the dancefloor, even if our men don’t”

Adelaide bachelorette, Penny Xenophon (19) says she’s had her dress ready all week”

“I’ve been told that it’s just like the movies” she says.

“I hope one of them lifts me up like in that Patrick Swayze film that mum and I secretly watch when the men go to night mass”


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