WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
Betoota Heights chippy Burt Luke has been struck down today by a mystery case of the tummy pains.
While there is plenty of gastroenteritis getting around the Channel Country, the comfortable boyfriend of one said he’s pretty sure he can rule that out.
“Yeah, it’s not squirty or anything and I don’t feel like vomiting,” he said.
“I’ve got no idea what’s going on,” continued the man who polished off his 5th beef pie topped with eggs, cheese, bacon and 150 mls of barbecue sauce.
“So weird.”
The rapidly ageing carpenter then told The Advocate that he’s open to suggestions and solutions to alleviate the feeling someone is poking a stick into his mid-rift.
“Reckon I should have some Kombucha or something?” laughed the bloke getting set for a Friday arvo counter meal.
When our reporter suggested that the regular consumption of process meat, cheese and pasty might have something to do with his gut health – Luke then laughed.
“Yeah maybe,” he laughed.
“The vanilla slice smoko desert could also have been a contributing factor,” he mused.
“Oh yeah and the 500mls of Mother energy drink.”
“When you think about it like that, maybe I haven’t been looking after my guts as much as I could have,” finished the man who momentarily considered bringing an apple to work next week.
“Ah well, hopefully it should calm down soon.”
“Right in time for lunch.”
More to come.
