A Coastal Thursday morning coffee group was rocked today when one of its members arrived at their local Coffee Club meet-up in attire wildly different to the group’s regular aesthetic. 

The weekly morning catch-up has been a staple in the 8-12 women large group (attendance depending on various trips to Burleigh Heads and/or Mornington Peninsula) for almost 20 years now. 

“We all originally knew each other because our kids went to the same school years ago. They’re all in their 30’s now but us girls still catch up every week like clockwork” one of the constituents told The Advocate. 

“And yes, there has been an unspoken dress code in recent years, pretty much once everyone hit their 60’s. We don’t enforce it, but it’s… understood”.

The dress code of course is the staple of the Coastal Boomer Elite; a tropical kaftan chiffon/linen set, more affectionately known as ‘Cult Leader Aesthetic’. 

“As we age gracefully we just really want to present to the world as a group of women who love a coffee, a chat and a flowy linen; but could also lead you to a compound in Byron Bay where deodorant doesn’t exist”.

“That is until today”.

Jenny Lyon, a 64 year old part time accountant at the local Primary School and just 4 years off retirement, decided to shake things up this morning and go for a casual jeans and shirt combo. 

“She’s always been a bit of a renegade” one member whispered to The Advocate after waving us over with a subtle swish of chiffon. “One time she ordered a full breakfast fry-up instead of our regular shared banana bread or croissant combo… and she didn’t even comment on how guilty she felt after it??”

It has been reported that the collective’s Facebook group has lit up today after this faux pas. “We’ve given Jenny a warning, we’re not monsters, we’re flexible. But if this happens again, we might have to move over to Gloria Jeans and not tell her.”

More to come. 


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here