The Nation

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact In a sad state of affairs, tennis fans across the country are grimacing at what lies ahead over the next two weeks. Fans of the racquet and ball game across the country are doing so after realising just how painful the next fortnight of being bombarded by ads for the upcoming season of Married at First Sight will...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The greatest game on Earth has put its nose in front of the proverbial tractor fire that is The National Party today in the race to have the most counterproductive and controversial offseason. While our public servants in Canberra have a much longer break that our rugby league playing heroes, the Nationals held a commanding...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The NRL has called for drastic new measures to be implemented today, in an attempt to combat the extended run of off-field indiscretions. Following a horror off-season where the game's players have repeatedly been unable to steer clear of trouble, NRL CEO Todd Greenberg has explained there will be some form of intervention. The games boss announced...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact An older Australian has so far lived his life under the impression that when he's got some folded ones to spend, he is the one who is always in the right. However, this afternoon around 4pm, he met his match. Hand on heart, Graeme Pooley said he'd seen a cheaper socket set at the Mitre...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The free state of Melbourne city is facing an unexpected shortage of recyclable novelty furniture, as cafe owners say they can't possibly justify buying another crate of milk that will be poured down the sink. "It's a real issue" says one local hospopreneur, Banjo Clementè (35). "Almond milk and macadamia milk don't come in crates. They come in four...

LOUIS BURKE| Sports Betting | CONTACT Tabloids papers and other bodies with nothing better to do have been a buzz with an unverified story that is unlikely to surprise anyone, stating that former Labor leader and One Nation NSW state leader Mark Latham is probably an anti-vaxxer by now. A role model for losers everywhere, Mark Latham is best known for leading the ALP...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact One of Glenn Campbell's favourite stories to tell his kids is that he was old enough to watch the moon-landing at the pub. Impressive, his kids thought. But on the bed that lies dormant within the happy-go-lucky sexagenarian's spare room is something that he's struggling to wrap his experienced head around. "There's a whole queen mattress...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact Betoota’s Old City District was the site of a morbid revelation earlier today as a Caucasian family dressed all in white sat in their scarcely furnished home, and came to the realisation that they are in fact a stock image. The unnamed family of four consisting of a father, mother, daughter and son were enjoying sitting on their neutral...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The historical wine region of Napa Valley in San Fransisco's greater Bay Area has today announced a name-change to Big Papi Valley. This comes after spokespeople for the region politely asked to be referred to as only 'Big Papi' in a new video that has been leaked through predominantly boys-only Whatsapp groups around the nation. Napa County is a...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Australians from all walks of life rose to news this morning that they can expect a few hot days coming up. The seasonably warm weather has taken a number of people by surprise, as it does most years. A Betoota Heights roofer, who says folk in his industry have it especially tough this time...