The Nation

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A popular condom found earlier this week inside out and stuck to a local bus has won preselection for Clive Palmer's controversial "United Australia Party". It is understood by The Advocate that Mr Palmer signed off on the preselection this afternoon, making the discarded contraceptive the official UAP candidate for the Maranoa at this year's...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The prominent coastal town has today praised the state and federal government for their tireless efforts in keeping potential tourists, or just run of the mill motorists, as far away as possible from their local businesses. The town at the centre of this particular bypass is Woolgoffs Tamba, a 20,000-or-so-person-town situated in the centre of New South Wales'...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Just days after the boss of the nation's third worst state went on breakfast television claiming she'd never had a bamboo schooner before, the Catholic church has released a study that supports Premier Gladys Berejiklian's claim that extremely harsh penalties that affect a young person's life until they die is the best way to...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Enjoying life outside of constant media scrutiny, former Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull took a private moment to partake in one of his guilty pleasures that he would have never risked doing while in office. “Could you imagine the field day those Murdoch pricks would have had if they’d of seen me doing this?” asked Turnbull as he laid...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In news out of the Kruger National Park in South Africa, disgraced former politician Sam Dastyari has revealed his latest gig since leaving parliament. The former Chinese Government mouthpiece and spokesperson for the Labor Party on issues like the South China Sea told fellow contestants on the reality tv show 'I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here' that...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Former conservative Queensland Premier Campbell Newman says drugs and their use should be legalised, in a radical new position often held by ex-politicians and policeman after they have retired or been shafted from positions of power that they only managed to hold by saying exactly the opposite of this kind of stuff. Newman says he wants a public...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Londoner Down Under who's found himself a nice group of Australian friends to hang out with is today bearing the brunt of their renewed interest in One Day Cricket after their victory over India over the weekend. George Clockhouse, a 27-year-old Englishman who does something in a French Quarter office with a computer...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local cheese platter became the talk of French Quarter last night when the eclectic mix of European cheese and smoked meats was overshadowed by an out of place but none-the-less tantalizing hummus. During a small get together of mid-thirties friends who now prefer wine, lounges and board games to pills, clubs and actual fun, a selection of...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact In a sad state of affairs, tennis fans across the country are grimacing at what lies ahead over the next two weeks. Fans of the racquet and ball game across the country are doing so after realising just how painful the next fortnight of being bombarded by ads for the upcoming season of Married at First Sight will...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The greatest game on Earth has put its nose in front of the proverbial tractor fire that is The National Party today in the race to have the most counterproductive and controversial offseason. While our public servants in Canberra have a much longer break that our rugby league playing heroes, the Nationals held a commanding...